The Story of L
by TheWammy'sHouseReject
Summary: From his birth to the Kira Investigation, L Lawliet had been set apart from the rest of the world. He's been shunned, he's been hated...he's been loved. This is his story.
1. The Child

To those who have never read this before, welcome. To all others, welcome back. This is the first of many rewritten chapters for The Story of L. I hope you enjoy.

* * *

Death Note, L Lawliet, and all other characters belong to Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata. I do not make any profit from this story.

* * *

Mewling whimpers. Quiet sobs. "Mama, please don't go!"

"Baby, I know, I wish I could keep you. I'm so sorry, baby."

A woman's calloused hands shake as they pin a letter to her son's chest. Tears ran down the toddler's face, and he shivered from the cold, knee deep in snow.

"I don't wanna go away, mama."

"I'm sorry. There's nothing...there's nothing else I can do..."

Her son deserved a better life than this, than living on the streets, wondering when they'll eat again, watching his own mother violate her body to maybe give them enough money to sleep indoors for a night. As much as it pained her, it was better this way.

"Please don't cry, sweetheart," she begs, caressing his pink flushed cheek and smiling at him with tired, dark eyes. "Be brave for mama, alright? You have to be a brave boy. You remember where I told you to go, right?"

The boy nodded, whining pitifully.

"Of course you do. You're the smartest boy I know. You'll do great things one day, I just know it." She taps his nose playfully. "I bet if you really wanted to, someday you could change the whole world."

"I-I love you mama."

"I love you too, babydoll. Be a good boy, now."

His mother turned her back to him, before she cried in front of him. The boy set off through the frigid night, not daring to look back.

It was the last time he ever saw his mother in this life.

**~L~**

Janet James had seen children come to her under the absolute worst of circumstances. As such, when she heard a knocking at the orphanage doorand found a shivering child standing out in the cold in the dead of night, her pity was rather limited. But, as it was her job, she ushered the child intothe clinical warmth of the orphanage, giving him a blanket and a change of clothes.

She took the note from the boy's shirt. The ink had run so badly that the whole thing was illegible, save for a single, capital letter L.

The boy wouldn't say a word, even to tell the staff his name. So they took to simply calling him L, and the name stuck.

He was well behaved, and stayed out of trouble for the most part. He did what he was told, and never got into fights with the other children. He just stayed in the corner, or in a closet, and played with the splintered blocks and broken dolls the other children didn't touch. When the older kids would push him around or give him a hard time, he would take it, good naturedly, and wait for them to get bored before returning to his work.

Eventually, L started talking. Incoherent babbling, mostly, but sometimes he would say something comprehensible, like 'mama' or 'sad', when he thought no one could hear him.

He would spell out words with alphabet blocks when prompted, and could identify objects put in front of him. He wasn't stupid.  
One day, late in February, L took the worn out alphabet blocks and started spelling something out.

_L-A-W-L-I-E-T_

"My mama," he said.

One of the attendants, a bright young woman named Elizabeth, noticed, and rushed right over to see what he had done.

"What is this, L?" She asked.

"My mama," The boy repeated, matter-of-factly. "Lawliet."

Elizabeth looked at the blocks, then up at the child. Then something clicked inside her brain.

"It's your mother's name?"

L nodded.

"She's gone outside. But she's not gone in my head. She's not gone in here." L put a tiny hand over his heart, offering up a shy smile. "So I'll be happy."

Now that L had finally decided to speak, he seemed to have a lot to say. It was the beginning of an insatiable curiosity, and a million questions. The beginning of a brilliant mind.

* * *

Thanks for reading the rewrite :) There's plenty more to come.


	2. A Book, A Castle, and a Doll

The sun cast a single beam of cheerful light through a single high-set, narrow window, illuminating the face of a small boy. He stirred under his covers, yawning and opening his dark, charcoal-colored eyes. He sat up, checking to see if the half dozen other boys he shared the room with were still asleep.

He crawled to the foot of his bed, hanging upside down from the footboard while staring at the collection of dust bunnies, and his clothing, kept in a slightly mildewed cardboard box.

The boy pulled his blanket along with him as he tumbled off the bed, reducing the noise of his landing to a muffled thud. He pulled the clothes out from under the bed, changing out of his pajamas.

Looking around to make sure everyone was still sleeping, he lifted up his mattress and pulled out the novel he had stolen from one the bookshelf last night. He crawled back under the covers and opened it up to the halfway point. His eyes grew wide and he grinned as he got lost in this alternate world.

The book he was reading was _The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes. _He turned the pages as fast as he could read them, wondering how he would solve this latest crime. He devoured the story with a fierce passion, his boundless curiosity never sated.

The boy jumped about a foot in the air as a sharp rap came on the door. A lock clicked and the door creaked open. An elderly (and rather sinister looking) woman stepped into the doorway.

"Wake up!" she commanded tersely, rousing the boy's companions. The boy poked his head out from the covers to prove he was indeed awake.

"Yes, Miss Oakley," the boys replied in unison.

The matron closed the door and left the boys to prepare for the day.

L lifted a corner of his mattress and shoved the book inside before pulling off his blanket again.

A shoe hit him in the back of the head, sending him tumbling off his bed again.

"Ow!" L shouted, rubbing the sore spot.

"Get off the ground, L. We've gotta go!"

L rubbed the back of his head, standing up and following the other boys out of the room.

It wasn't the first time he had come into contact with projectile footwear, but he could admit (to himself, if no one else) that it probably wouldn't be the last time.

The day went by as it always did. The oatmeal was gray, the orphanage workers were cold, and L got pushed off the rusty old swing set on the dilapidated playground to land in the mud.

Just an ordinary beginning to an ordinary day.

In the afternoon, he sat in the playroom quietly, stacking faded blocks (missing most of their paint) to build a castle as tall as it could go.

_I wish I lived in a castle, _he thought. _One where I could look up from the tallest parapet and look down at the world, and everyone would seem so small…and it would have a bell tower. And I could sit at the very top of the world and ring the bells all day long, like Quasimodo did._

"Aw, isn't that cute? The little baby still plays with dollies!"

A little girl began crying somewhere behind him. L turned around to see a ten-year-old boy holding a baby doll over his head while the little girl tried in vain to get it back. The boy knocked the girl to the ground. L scowled and stood up, running over to the scene of the uproar.

He got between the little girl and the boy, legs wide apart, arms spread out to protect the girl behind him.

"Outta my way, Lawliet!"

L stood his ground, staring at the older boy with as much confidence as he could muster.

"If you wanna pick on someone, then go ahead and pick on me!" L said, stubbornly refusing to move. "I don't really care if you want to hurt someone, but at least hurt me instead. If you think hurting me will make you happy then go ahead and do it!"

For a while, the older boy did nothing. He merely stood watching the unmoving five year old in front of him, drawn up to his full four-foot height.

Then, he grabbed L by the collar of his blue tee shirt; pulling him so close that he was almost nose-to-nose with him.

"You wanna mess with me, punk?"

Despite the fact that he was frightened, L smirked and kept his cool. "Yes, I do want to mess with you, Ryan. If you really want to hurt me, please feel free."

Ryan was all too willing to oblige. He punched L across the face before setting to work on the rest of him.

When he was done, L lay crying on the ground, nursing a twisted arm and wiping blood from his upper lip, the recovered doll cradled in the crook of his arm.

Nobody who had seen had bothered to help, and had merely watched, looking somewhat interested. But that was what happened in a crowd of people. L had read once that the more people witnesses something, the less likely that someone would help. So, he thought nothing of it.

The girl he had taken the beating for crawled up to him, wiping the blood off his face with her tiny hand. L handed her the doll, trying to smile at her through the tears, his vision slightly blurry.

"Thank you," she whispered, hugging her treasure to her chest, then hugging L.

L went back to where his castle had been to find the castle destroyed and the blocks taken away. He sat in the empty spot on the floor, smiling to himself.

No matter how much he had been through, no matter how badly he'd gotten hurt, he'd gotten the little girl's doll back. He had stopped Ryan the bully from hurting her. He had shown Ryan that idle threats and sheer brute force was not enough to get by in the real world. Maybe next time he would think twice about hurting people. Maybe he wouldn't be so mean.

But that didn't matter. If he didn't learn his lesson, then he'd continue to beat on L. But L didn't mind.

L was perfectly willing to get beaten up every day of his life.

Just as long as there was someone else that didn't have to.

**~L~**

End of Chapter Two. Please review :D


	3. I Want to be Loved

Late at night, L read the remainder of his book, struggling to make out each word in the dim moonlight. It irritated him that he couldn't read any faster, and he was constantly shifting to try and get better illumination.

Finally, he reached the end. Though he was delighted that Watson and Holmes had solved the case, he was slightly disappointed at the conclusion. He had really hoped that the supernatural aspect of the case would lead to the solution- but, in truth, the case was rather mundane. Just a dog with some glowing paint.

L closed the book and fell asleep, dreaming about a world where he could

A world where he was surrounded by friends.

A world where he had a family who loved him.

A world where he wasn't alone.

**~L~**

L kept looking over his shoulder to make sure nobody was watching (which they weren't) and back again to see whether anyone was in front of him (which they also weren't). He snuck up, as silently as he could, to the old wooden bookshelf where the younger children were forbidden to go. He slipped the book back onto the shelf and ran.

He ran back to be with the other children, doing his best to pretend that nothing had happened. In his paranoia, he continued to worry about whether he'd be caught

He built a house out of blocks and old picture books, using one of the skinnier blocks to be Watson. He came up to the door and knocked.

"_Yes, what is it, Watson?" _Holmes, another block, asked.

"_Sir, there have been reports of residents of Baskervilles hearing a dog howling in the dead of night," _the Watson block replied. _"They're blaming it on a ghost." _The Watson block and the Holmes block conversed for a while, talking about the technicalities of the case.

"_The game's afoot!"_

L passed away the remainder of playtime reenacting the Baskervilles case, trying to get rid of the nagging, omnipresent feeling that this was just a game- he was not Sherlock Holmes, no matter how many times he pretended to be.

He watched the older children leave for school, and began putting the blocks back in the unfinished, splintering wooden toy chest, humming tunelessly, smiling to himself.

It really wasn't so bad. Sure, the toys were mostly broken, the food was bad, and the bed was hard, but there had to be people who had it worse than him. People with no toys, no food, and no bed at all.

Still…at least _some _of those people with no toys, food or beds had parents who loved them. At the very least, they might have a brother or sister to keep them company.

Sometimes he wished he had a big brother to look up to, but he tried not to dwell on it as he went about the rest of his day.

Later in the evening, a young couple came in looking to adopt a little boy. L's heart leapt. Just maybe…

The matron had all the boys line up while the couple looked each of them over, occasionally stopping to talk to them, debating quietly amongst themselves every once in a while.

Eventually they got to L. He did his best to restrain himself, looking down at his socked feet, trying not to let anticipation and anxiety get the better of him.

"Aw, he's just adorable, isn't he?" the wife said giddily. "What's your name?"

"Um…L Lawliet, ma'am."

The man raised an eyebrow. "Where does a kid get a name like that?" he asked, to which L simply shrugged.

The wife gave her husband an imploring look. "Honey…he's just _darling!"_

"I don't know…"

The couple went into the back room with the matron, leaving L just outside the door. L listened in as best he could through the thick wood. He caught words such as "Troublesome," and "Better off without…"

When the couple finally emerged, all three of the adults looked down on him with disdain. They walked right by him without saying a word, and went to look at the remainder of the boys.

L's hope crumbled inside him. He stood there uncomprehending, trying to hold back tears as the young couple walked out of the orphanage with a blond curly haired eight-year-old boy.

"Why…" he started, but he was cut off by a sharp slap to the face by the matron.

"Don't you get it?" the old crone asked. "Do you think anyone would want you? You're nobody. Do you know what you are? The bastard child of a drunkard and a whore, that's what! You've been more trouble than you're worth from the very beginning!"

The matron stormed off. The tears welled up, and L began crying.

_Bastard… more trouble than you're worth…_

Where had that come from? He had never intentionally done anything wrong. He asked too many questions at times, and he got sick fairly often, but none of it was _that _serious. Was it?

L fell onto his knees and continued crying.

_I'm worthless, _he thought. _Nobody'll ever want me now. _

He sniffled. The other children gathered around him, whispering and giggling, calling him 'worthless bastard Lawliet'.

"I bet the L stands for loser!" one of the older boys yelled.

"Or Lame!"

L let off a choked sob. What had he done to be treated like this? What had he done to be hated?

_I don't want to be alone..._

Why was he so different? Just because he didn't like to wear shoes? Because he was always so pale? What was it about him that made everyone hate him? What had he ever done to be hated?

_I just want someone to love me…_

**~L~**

Thanks for reading! BTW, if you fave this story (not that I'm asking you to) please leave a review explaining why.


	4. Worthless

Crying is a funny thing. Though we may feel miserable while we are crying, in general afterwards most of us tend to feel a lot better.

So was the case with L. When he had exhausted the last of his tears while hiding in a closet that night, he offered a small, jaded smile to the darkness. It was almost funny now how the matron had yelled at him. It was almost funny how she had hit him.

Almost.

He curled up next to a broom and a mop bucket and fell asleep.

He woke up a while later, still arched on the ground. He lay there silently for a few moments, listening to the sounds of the children heading to breakfast.

He sat up, focusing his eyes on some nonexistent point in the blackness as meaningless words drifted through the aging wood, debating about whether or not he could come out. He tried to remember the date.

October Thirty-first.

Halloween.

His birthday.

How could he have forgotten again? Of course, this was only his sixth birthday, so he still had quite a few years to get it right.

The voices were no longer as loud or clear as they once were. That meant that all the other children had headed in for breakfast. He would be there too, if he had not decided to spend the night in a broom cupboard.

He opened the door and looked around. Everybody was in the dining hall. Although L's stomach growled, it activated his gag reflex to think of eating any more of the orphanage's fare. He decided the sensation of hunger was preferable to the sensation of nausea.

For the rest of the day, L took care to not draw any attention to himself. Still, the other children made it a habit to tease him, to point out everything about him that they didn't like. Nobody seemed to remember or even acknowledge the fact that he was now six years in this world.

He sat dejectedly in the corner, staying out from under the other children's radar. This became routine as days and weeks drifted by. He learned to never respond to the taunts of the other children, and in time, they left him well alone.

A few tried to be kind to him, but his iciness prevented them from getting too close. So, in time, they left him alone as well. He was all alone with his mind.

He began to ponder the mysteries of the world. He wondered what made the lights turn on and off when the switch was flipped. He wondered why his socks wore holes in them or what made the seasons change.

It was during one of these musing sessions that an aging man entered the orphanage. He looked around before requesting the matron. She came out and he spoke to her for a while, pointing to L on occasion. The matron's voice steadily rose from a heated whisper to a borderline shout, while the man's voice remained steady and calm.

They moved into the matron's office, and L desperately wished that he could listen in.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

"I just don't understand how he is a troublemaker," The man said exasperatedly.

"He's caused trouble from the first day he's been here!" the matron yelled. "Why can't you see sense?"

"Last time I checked, you have no say in which of these children I take."

"Sir-"

"I'm taking the boy with me. Now where do I need to sign?"

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

The man emerged from the office, and L's heart skipped a beat. He didn't look angry. As a matter of fact, he was smiling. Well, a small smile, but it was still there.

He walked up to him, offering a hand. L sat there dumbstruck, not knowing how to react.

"Come on," the man said, "I'm taking you out of here."

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

He couldn't believe it.

He just couldn't believe it.

He was getting out of there.

He was going to get out of there!

L was grinning wider than he'd ever grinned in his life, holding the man's hand and following him out into the rain.

He shivered in the cold air, and the man shook his head in disapproval.

"I'll have to buy you a coat," he muttered.

"So…" L asked tentatively, "Wh-what should I call you?"

The man smiled. "You can call me Watari."

Watari hailed a taxi and directed the driver to take them to a store. L stared at the downpour, blinking slowly, lost in thought.

"I don't like rain," he said suddenly, causing Watari to jump.

"Why not?" he asked.

"One day," L said thoughtfully, "An older girl told me that it only rained when the angels in Heaven cried."

Tears welled up in his big obsidian eyes.

"I don't want the angels to be sad."

He wiped away the unshed tears with a tiny fist. "I hope they feel better soon."

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

L walked happily alongside Watari as they approached a hotel, hugging his new coat close to himself and smiling cheerfully.

"It's so warm," he remarked, looking up at Watari, who smiled to himself.

They checked in and had dinner in a restaurant in the hotel.

After they had eaten, Watari let L pick out any dessert he wanted. The boy went wide-eyed at the selection, pondering his choice for a long time before settling on a hot fudge sundae.

When the waitress brought it to the table, L's black eyes nearly popped out of his head. He tentatively took a spoonful of the gooey vanilla ice cream and ate it slowly. A mile crept onto his face.

"It's really good," he said approvingly, before digging in and attacking the rest.

When he had finished, they left to go up to their hotel room. The clock read nine-thirty, so Watari told L to get ready for bed.

"Is there anything else you need before you go to sleep?" Watari asked.

L was silent for a moment.

"Can I…can I have a hug?" he asked.

After a moment of silence, Watari said, "Of course you can."

L beamed and hugged Watari with all his strength, as if afraid to let go.

"Thank you so much," he said, tears streaming down his face. "Thank you for everything!"

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

Watari sat on his bed that night, watching L sleep in the bed across from him.

L had been called a troublemaker. But as far as Watari could gather, he was far from that. Lonely, yes, but not a troublemaker.

The boy was quite clearly starving for some affection. Affection and a good home.

Watari laughed to himself. How had he gotten into this situation in the first place? Oh, yes, that was right.

His wife had recently passed away, and he was searching for something to fill the void. He had no clue how he had settled on adopting a child, but that was what had happened. And now here he was, watching a six-year-old boy sleep and contemplating this turn his life had taken.

He would make arrangements to travel back to his home in England in the morning. He would have to get the boy a passport…

So many things to do.

L whined and turned over in bed. Watari let out a sigh, turned off the lights, and went to sleep.

Later that night, L shook his shoulders.

"Watari?" he called in a small voice. "Watari, please wake up."

Watari turned over. "What's wrong, L?" he asked.

"I had a bad dream," the boy replied. "I got scared."

"It was just a dream."

"I know, but it was still scary. I dreamed that you got mad at me and made me go back to the orphanage!" his voice was becoming frantic. "I don't ever wanna go back there! They all hate me! I don't wanna go back! Please promise me you'll never make me go back!"

"Why would I ever send you back?"

"Because I cause trouble. Because I'm not worth anything."

Watari sat up, confused now. "Now who told you that nonsense?"

"Everyone always told me that at the orphanage. They'd always call me names. They'd make fun of me because I sit funny. They'd make fun of me 'cause I never wear any shoes. They'd call me a dummy and a retard and 'worthless bastard Lawliet.' "

"Don't say that!" Watari snapped, and then took a deep breath to calm down. He took L by the shoulders.

"Listen to me, L," he said. "Nobody on this Earth is worthless. Nobody's life is worth more than another, and just because you're different than they are does not mean that you are worth any less than they are. No matter how much people make fun of you, you are still a human being and are not worth any less. Do you understand me?"

L nodded.

"Good boy. Now go back to sleep. Goodnight, L."

"I love you, Watari."

Watari rolled over and tried to go back to sleep, but was kept awake by those four words.

_I love you, Watari._

_I love you._

**A/N **d'aww! It's so sweet I'm getting a cavity-ow!

Anyway, there you have it. The beginning of L's love affair with sugar! Please review, and thanks for reading!

**P.S **Happy birthday, L! happy Halloween, everybody else!


	5. Macbeth, Act One, Scene Seven

**A/N** sorry for the short chapter. I kinda have a short attention sp-SQUIRREL! Wait, what was I saying?

Anyway, I don't own Death Note.

The cold, unrelenting late-November rain had turned to snow when Watari and L arrived at his home in England. The boy looked around the inside of the house with starry-eyed wonder, marveling at the brightly painted walls and softly carpeted floors. It was so unlike the cold, forbidding gray building he had lived in for so long.

"Come on, L. I'll show you to your room."

"I get my own room? Wow!"

L followed Watari up a couple flights of stairs to a door that opened up into a large bedroom with a large, fluffy white bed and a sliding glass door that opened out into a balcony.

"Whoa… is this really all mine?" he asked in disbelief.

"Yep," Watari replied.

"Whoa…"

L walked in, looking around in amazement.

"I never got my own room back in the orphanage," he remarked. "Nobody did… Watari, what's a whore?"

Watari was thoroughly taken aback. "Where would a boy like you learn a word like that?"

"Um…people called my mom that all the time. They used to call me the son of a whore. I wanna know what it means."

"…It's nothing, L. you don't have to worry about that."

L stomped his foot.

"Nobody ever tells me anything!" he yelled. "Everybody treats me like a baby and tells me that I'm too young to understand! I don't get it!"

"L, it is none of your concern!" Watari snapped.

The moment he did, he was sorry. L's face fell. Tears welled up in his eyes, and he looked down.

"…Please don't yell at me," he whispered, his voice like thin glass, threatening at any moment to break. "I _hate _it when people yell at me. I _hate _it when people yell. It always sounds ugly."

Watari took a deep breath, rubbing his forehead.

"Everyone always yells at me," L continued. "You said I wasn't worth less than they are, but none of them ever got yelled at. So what makes them so special?"

Watari scratched his head, not sure how to respond.

"Some people like to delude themselves into thinking they're more important than they really are. When that happens, there has to be someone less important, in their minds, to pick on, to make themselves feel better."

L scowled.

"It's not fair," L pouted. "Why do people think that's okay to stomp on people like that?"

"I don't know, L. I don't know."

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

"So?"

The psychiatrist looked over his notes for a moment, pausing to push his glasses further up his nose.

"He's…not exactly what I'd call 'normal'," he confessed.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Watari snapped.

"It's not bad," the psychiatrist said quickly. "He's…well, this is a bit of an understatement, but…he's _brilliant. _Absolutely _brilliant."_

Watari smirked triumphantly.

Understatement?" he asked.

"Well, yes, actually. For a six-year-old boy who's never set foot in a classroom before, he's remarkably intelligent. He reads at a twelfth grade level, he can comprehend math up to a seventh grade level, and…well…he quoted Shakespeare to me."

"…Shakespeare?" Watari's voice was incredulous.

"Yes. Shakespeare. _I dare do all that may become a man; who dares do more is none. _He even told me where to find it. Macbeth, act one, scene seven."

"…Okay…that's not weird at all."

"I _told _you he was brilliant."

Watari smiled. The psychiatrist looked at the rest of his notes.

"However," he said, "from what he has told me, he has a history of both physical and emotional abuse. He also seems to disassociate himself from his surroundings when things get bad. To put it bluntly, that is not a good way to deal with life."

Watari scratched his head. "So," he asked, "How can he get over that?"

"Simply put, you need to help him deal with his problems instead of shutting down."

"And how exactly would I accomplish that?"

"I'm a psychiatrist, not a parent. Everyone has a different approach. I can't tell you what to do. Anyway, he's perfectly healthy mentally, and is quite intelligent. I believe he'll do well."

"Alright then. I'll take him home now."

"That'll be fine." The psychiatrist smiled. "L? You can come out now."

L poked his head out of the examination room door, face beaming, having heard almost every word said.

Watari offered him a smile in return before taking his hand and leaving the office.

"Why're we walkin' home, Watari?" he asked.

"Well, it's not far, and I like the snow."

"'Kay."

They walked in silence for a while, L looking around in childlike innocence, taking in the soft, fluffy snow and the weak sun glittering off the frozen lake.

"So, L, have you ever thought about what you want to be when you grow up?" Watari asked, to break the silence.

"A detective," L replied, without any hesitation.

"Why a detective?"

"Well, because that's what Sherlock Holmes it, silly! His books are amazing!"

Watari was confused. "You've read Sherlock Holmes?"

"Well, not _all_ of them. I've only read up to _The Howling Dogs of Baskervilles."_

The boy smiled, and in an exaggeratedly deep voice, proclaimed, "Why, Elementary, my dear Watson!"

Watari couldn't help it. He started to laugh.

**A/N **thanks for reading! I'm not asking you to favorite this, but if you do, please leave a review explaining why. It kind of irritated me when I post a chapter and get five faves and only one review. If you don't like something, tell me how to fix it. if you like something, tell me about it so I can keep doing it. Thank ya bunches!


	6. A Leaf

Chapter Four

"So, do I get to go to school?" L asked, leaning on the kitchen counter, chewing on a Pop-Tart and looking bored.

"Well, I've decided it would be best to tutor you from home."

L snorted.

"He…tutor. That's a funny word."

Watari would have rebuked him, but for some reason decided to forego it. He set the textbooks down on the table and opened one of them up.

"Okay, L. We're going to start with some history. So just sit down and we can begin."

L pulled the chair out and sat, drawing his knees up under his chin, wrapping his hands around his legs.

Ignoring the odd manner in which he was sitting, Watari began the lesson. L listened intently, absorbing as much of what was being spoken as he could.

Watari was amazed. Even when the material was difficult, he asked questions ruthlessly and tried again and again until he got it right.

"Yes!" he shouted, pumping his fist into the air. "I finally got it!" he grinned triumphantly at his math paper. "Watari, I got it!" he shouted to the other room.

"Good work, L! I'll be in to check it in a moment!"

L doodled absentmindedly in the corner of his paper. A star, a moon, the Earth. He stared at it for a long moment, chewing absentmindedly on his thumbnail.

_I wonder if the moon ever gets lonely, _he thought. _All alone up in the sky…at least she has the stars to keep her company. But maybe the stars don't like the moon, so they leave her all alone._

He sighed.

_I'm like the moon. I'm always surrounded by other people, but none of them care about me. _

_But now it's different. Now I have Watari. Watari cares about me. _

_That's all I really need._

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

L jumped up on his bed, flinging the pillow onto the floor.

"Hey, be careful! If you keep jumping like that, the bed will fall right through the floor!"

"No it won't. Don't be stupid."

"I'm not being stupid, it's the truth! The bed will fall right through the floor. It happened to me when I was younger."

The boy stopped jumping. "You were younger?"

"Of course I was. Everyone was a kid at one time or another."

"Really?"

"You know, I'd think that a kid as smart as you would know that already."

"I guess so. I just like asking questions."

"Why?"

"Because I wanna know stuff, silly!"

"What kind of stuff?" Watari asked.

"Everything!" L said, determination echoing from his voice. "You know, now _you're _the one who's asking questions!"

The wind blew through the open window.

"Geez, that's cold!" L shouted, wrapping his arms around himself.

Watari smiled and pulled the blanket around him. The boy tugged it tighter around himself, grinning in the newfound warmth.

"It's like being wrapped up in a big, fluffy marshmallow!" he declared happily. "Or maybe a bunny rabbit."

The two sat in silence for a moment. The breeze continued it's blustering, blowing the remnants of autumn's leaves into the bedroom. Some landed on the bedclothes. One got caught in L's messy black hair.

He pulled it out, looking slightly annoyed.

"Stupid leaf," he pouted. "Leaves belong outside, not inside." He threw the leaf toward the window.

"Go home, leaf!" he commanded.

The wind blew the leaf back into L's hair. Watari pulled it back out.

"I think this oak leaf has taken a liking to you, L," he chuckled.

"I don't like leaves."

Watari held the leaf up to his face.

"And what exactly did this leaf ever do to upset you? It just flew in the window by accident. It's not a big deal."

L laughed. "I'm just jokin' around! I really don't mind." He pulled the leaf away from Watari. "I like the color. It's like a sunset."

The boy twirled the leaf around between his fingers. "It's pretty," he mumbled, yawning.

"Well, I think it's time for you to get to sleep.

"But I'm not tired yet," he muttered, settling into the covers, his eyes fluttering shut. Watari pulled the blanket further over him and ruffled his dark hair.

He stood up and closed the window before flicking out the light.

"I love you, Watari," L whispered sleepily.

Watari was stone silent for a moment.

"…Goodnight, L," he said, before he shut the door.

**A/N **another chapter done! Please leave a review and I will update soon!


	7. Boundless Potential

L peeled back the wrapping on the bottom of his cupcake and took a bite, walking out of the kitchen into the foyer.

Watari said he had somewhere he needed to take L, and he'd be back when it was time to go.

"Watari?" he called. "Watari?"

The front door opened, and Watari stepped in.

"L, come on," he said. "Let's get going."

"Okay!"

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

After an hour or so in the car, they arrived.

"What is this place, Watari?" he asked.

"This is Wammy's house," Watari replied simply.

"Who's Wammy?"

"It's me."

"But I thought your name was Watari."

"…That's not important now. Let's go inside."

L held Watari's hand as they walked up to the gates, the snow blowing around them.

The gates creaked open, a half snowed-in pathway leading up to an old building that resembled a church.

"Wow… it's cool…"

They walked up to the huge front double doors, and Watari pushed it open, revealing the red-carpeted interior.

A few children poked their heads out of doors to see the new arrivals.

"Here's where you'll be staying from now on, L."

"But I thought I was staying over at the other house, Watari!" L whined.

"I know, but I thought it would be better if you were able to interact with some other children. You can't just be at home all the time. You'll have fun here."

"Okay."

A man who looked to be a little older than Watari walked up and shook hands with him.

"Quillsh, welcome back," he smiled.

"Hello."

"Wait a minute. First you're Watari, then you're Wammy, _then _you're Quillsh? Just who the heck are you really?"

Watari chuckled. "Those are _all _my names, L. My name is Quillsh Wammy, but most people just call me Watari."

L cocked his head. "What kind of a name is Quillsh Wammy?"

"Well, what kind of a name is L Lawliet?"

"…Touché."

"Okay, L. I have some things I have to take care of. You feel free to look around."

The two men left. The other children stared at L, waiting for him to make a move.

"Um…hi?" he said tentatively. "My name is L."

The other children surrounded him, looking him over cautiously.

"Why is your name L?"

"I don't know."

"How did you get here?"

"Watari adopted me."

"Why aren't you wearing any shoes?"

"I don't like shoes."

"Are you Watari's favorite?"

"I'm not his favorite!" L insisted.

"Oh, Yeah? Then why did he adopt you and not any of us?"

L shrugged.

"I really don't know. Nobody else ever wanted me."

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

"So, what are you saying, Quillsh?"

"What I'm saying, Roger, is that this boy has boundless potential. He's brilliant. Simply brilliant."

"So what do you plan to do with him?"

"L wants to be a detective. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get him there."

"I'm impressed. I didn't know you had such a soft heart. Your wife always told me you had a soft spot for children, but I'd never really believed it, even after you started this place."

Watari sighed.

"Maria always wanted a child," he confessed. "A boy. When she found out she couldn't…"

"She was always a bit gloomy after that," Roger said quietly. "She was an interesting woman."

Watari nodded.

"I still miss her," Watari said sadly.

"If you didn't still miss her, I'd say you weren't human."

"Yes…"

Watari looked out the window at the snow.

The hurt would always be there.

But Maria wouldn't want him to be miserable. She would want him to move on.

So he'd do his best.

**A/N **Thanks for reading! Once I get about three reviews for this chapter, I'll post another :D


	8. Anything You Want

Watari peeked into the playroom. L had a pair of sock puppets on his hands, telling a story to the other children.

"_Die, evil alien scum!" _he yelled, his right hand attacking his left.

"_Oh, No!" _the left lamented, _"I have been defeated!"_

The children clapped, cheering.

L switched the sock on his hand to one with exaggerated red lips and a head full of yellow yarn.

"_Oh, you were so brave!" _he said in a high, female voice. _"Kiss me, you fool!"_

"Eeeew!" the other children whined. "L, that's gross!"

L pouted. "Hey, I'm telling the story here!"

Watari smiled.

"Having fun?" he asked.

The boy looked over, a huge grin plastered onto his face.

"Yeah!"

"So, L, are you okay with staying here?"

L thought.

"If I stay, can I still be a detective?" he asked.

"Of course."

"Then, yeah!"

Watari smiled wider.

_L, _he thought, _you can do anything you want, as long as you believe in yourself. As long as you never lose sight of what's important to you._

_As long as you do that, you can be anything._

**A/N super short chapter, I know. But please review anyway!**


	9. Never Again

L practically jumped off the tarmac to meet the people who would help with his first case. He had never been so excited in all the thirteen years he'd been alive.

He was lucky to even be here. It had taken hours of intense argument for Watari to even convince these people to let a child on the case at all.

After quick introductions, L was led to the morgue. A little girl had been murdered. She was the twelfth one in as many weeks, and they couldn't find any leads, so they called in for a better detective, and got L.

They pulled back the sheet covering her body. L almost fainted.

Her throat had been cut, bruises and burns covering her body. She had obviously suffered a long time before she had died.

He was handed a stack of photographs. L looked at them a long time, his breath coming in shallow gasps.

He covered his mouth with his hands, dropping the pictures on the ground. Eyes shut tight, he fell to his knees, trembling.

"What's wrong with this kid?" one of the police officers demanded.

Watari knelt beside L and picked up the photographs. They each depicted a girl of around twelve, naked, covered in blood with her underwear shoved down her throat.

Watari hugged L, stroking his dark hair.

"L, if you want to leave, you don't have to stay."

L shook his head. "I wanna stay."

Watari patted his head.

"Okay. If that's what you want."

L looked at the photographs of the mangled girls.

_I'm gonna stay. _He thought. _I'm gonna stay and I'm gonna find out who's doing this. Then, I'm gonna make sure nobody ever gets hurt again._

_Never again._

**A/N **sorry the chapter's so short, but please review!


	10. Don't Worry

**A/N for anyone who cares to know, I changed the date from 1987 to 1995 because L died in 2007 and he was 25 then, and he's about thirteen now. Just so you know.**

It was pointless.

Absolutely pointless.

After five hours of looking through every piece of evidence they could get a hold of, they had gotten nowhere.

L's head hit his desk with a thud, resting next to the evidence box and a half-eaten chocolate cupcake.

"This is pointless," he moaned.

_I can't give up now! _He thought angrily. _If I give up, then who's gonna find the guy who did this? Those girls still haven't gotten the justice that they deserve. If I can't do it, then who will?_

He furrowed his brow.

_But all of this seems so impossible._

It wasn't as if he was going to find a serial murderer by staring at a bunch of photographs.

_Wait a minute…_

L flipped through the pictures until he found one toward the back. It wasn't anything special- a picture of another one of the victims laying in the grass. But that wasn't what he was looking at. He rummaged around in the drawer for a magnifying glass.

He felt like Sherlock Holmes looking through the glass, and couldn't help smiling.

That's when he found it.

A series of numbers were scrawled in the girl's blood on the wall.

_8 24 2007 10033 12 1 16 12 5 19 20 18 5 5 20 19 16 18 9 14 7 12 12 5 4 5 20 18 15 9 20_

L copied down the numbers, drawing little boxes around each set. He fiddled around, doodling on the paper for awhile before an idea hit him.

"Watari!" L called urgently.

Watari opened the door.

"What is it?" he asked.

"What day is it today?"

"Um… the twenty-ninth of July. Why does it matter?"

"Look at this."

L pointed out the sets of numbers.

"Eight twenty-four, two thousand. Doesn't that sound like a date to you?"

"It could be."

L pointed out the next.

"Ten zero thirty-three. At first I didn't think much of it, but then I saw the next set."

He pointed to the last two sets.

"These were the ones that gave me the most trouble. But now I think I know what they are. I think it might be some sort of encryption."

"Encryption? You mean like a code?"

"Exactly. If each of these numbers stands for a different letter, then the twelve would probably be the letter m, one is the letter a, and so forth."

He wrote out the letters underneath the numbers until they spelled "Maple Street, Springville, Detroit."

"So the ten zero thirty-three is probably a house number, and the date could be the day he intends to kill another girl. In this case, the twenty fourth of August."

"How do you know?" Watari asked, thoroughly confused

"I wasn't sure at first," L admitted. "But then I noticed that similar patterns of numbers appear at each crime scene. The pattern of numbers always reveals the place, as well as the date of death of the next girl to be murdered."

"Look," he said, pointing to another picture. "This girl died on January twelfth. That date was written in blood at the previous crime scene."

He indicated the first.

"Obviously, this man plans his kills very carefully."

L scowled.

"This guy, whoever he is, is a bully and a coward. But I'll find him. Just watch me, Watari.

He looked at the list of the murdered girls' names.

_Don't worry,_ he thought, _I'll find justice._

**A/N **please review!


	11. Almost There

Sorry it's been a while! My computer crashed on me!

L jolted awake as the old black car jerked over a speed bump.

He had dreamed that the investigative team had gotten there too late to prevent the next little girl from dying. That they had seen her mangled body on the floor, the date of his next kill written on the wall above her.

But he had to relax. They were going as fast as they could chasing a murderer cross-country.

"Watari?"

"Yes?" the older man called from the driver's seat.

"Um…where are we?"

"Five miles outside Detroit. After that, it's about a twenty-five minutes until we get to Springville."

"Okay."

L took a deep breath. It hadn't really happened. It was just a dream.

Thirty minutes later, they finally pulled up outside a pretty white house. L jumped out of the car, sending the other ten investigators on a chase after him.

L rang the doorbell just as the others ran up behind him.

A darling, tiny girl with bright green eyes and a head of curly blonde hair answered the door. Her parents came up, looking worried about the official looking men at their door.

"What do you want?" the father asked.

"We're with the FBI," L said simply. "And your daughter is in danger."

**A/N **Merry Christmas, everyone! This year I asked Santa Claus for lots of reviews. So, who wants to make my wish come true? *Gives puppy-dog eyes*


	12. Save Her

"Where are we going?" the little girl asked, trembling with fear and uncertainty.

"Somewhere where you can be safe," L reassured, taking her by the hand and patting it. "What's your name?"

"Lynda."

L smiled. "Well, don't worry, Lynda, you'll be safe where we're taking you."

"Where's that?"

L's face fell.

"I'm…not entirely sure," He admitted. "Watari, where are we going?"

The old man turned around.

"We're heading to a hotel about a hundred miles away from the house. We've set up officers on the inside of the house. When the murderer shows up, he'll be leaving the house in chains. You mark my words."

"Yes!" L shouted, beaming triumphantly and pumping a fist in the air. "Nobody believed I could do it, but I did it!"

Watari smiled and turned his attention back to the road. They drove in relative silence for a while, the steady roar of the engine the only noise they could hear.

Then, there was a jolt, a loud _crunch, _and the car came to a halt. Lynda screamed, Watari swore, and L let out an involuntary gasp of pain.

"Is anybody hurt?" L cried, nursing what he assumed to be a broken arm. Lynda shook her head. Watari appeared to be unconscious. L climbed out of the car.

"No matter what happens," he said gravely, "Please don't get involved."

A sleek red sports car had rammed right into the back of their black Sedan. A man was climbing out of the front, unhurt except for a few minor scratches. He matched, word for word, the description of the prime suspect in this case.

"I don't like it when somebody messes with my kills," he said dangerously. "Let alone a spoiled little brat like you. Get outta my way."

"I'll _die _before I let you touch _anyone _in this car! L shouted, spreading his arms out to form a fragile barrier, summoning up all the strength in his four foot eleven, thirteen and a half year old stature.

The man pulled out a knife and, with lightning speed, plunged it into L's shoulder.

L screamed and crumbled to the ground, clutching his shoulder, feeling blood pulsing hot and wet, down his front.

The murderer hoisted him up and threw him back into the car, grabbing Lynda and pulling her out.

"Help me!" she shouted, kicking with all her might, as the man wiped his knife off on his shirt and prepared to end this seven-year-old girl's life.

Watari moaned, stirring, then awakening.

There had been the crash…and then…

He saw the murderer holding the girl, testing the knife out on her cheek. He saw L, bloody and half conscious in the back seat.

Watari undid his belt buckle and stepped out of the car.

"Stop this!" he shouted, reaching for his gun. "You're finished."

"Nope," the man hissed. "But _you're _finished, ya old geezer."

There was a bang, the sound of shattering glass, and the man dropped to the ground. Lynda hit the concrete, blood oozing from the cut on her cheek.

Watari jerked around. L was holding a gun in his hands. The spare Watari kept in the glove compartment. His face was pale, his eyes wide. He shook all over, covered in blood.

He smiled weakly.

"You wouldn't…have been able…to save her…but I already had the gun." He frowned a little as he looked at the murderer.

"I really…can't stand…bullies."

L closed his eyes and fainted, slumping against the seat, the gun still held loosely in his hands.

A police car pulled up, probably on routine patrol when he heard the gunshots.

"What just happened?" the officer asked, awestruck.

"I'll have to explain later," Watari said urgently. "But for now, please call an ambulance.

A while later, the paramedics declared the murderer, Robert Cougar, dead at the scene. L had shot him straight through the neck, killing him almost instantly. They rushed L out of the car and onto a stretcher. Lynda would be taken to have her cut looked at.

As the ambulance rushed toward the hospital, a feeling of enormous pride swelled up inside Watari at the courage L had just displayed. It was incredible. Just incredible. Watari tried to think of another child who would have done what L did. None came to mind.

"What's his name?" a female paramedic asked, pointing to the boy.

"L Lawliet," Watari said proudly. "My son."

**A/N **Please leave a review!


	13. Did I Win?

L shook his head as he came back to consciousness, feeling groggy. He was vaguely aware of a needle in his arm, and the steady beeping of a heart rate monitor.

"Watari?" he called, anxiety filling him. Was he here? Was he alright?

"I'm right here," Watari assured, taking his hand. "I'm glad you're alright."

L smiled. "I'm glad _you're _alright. What happened?"

"You tell me."

L looked around the room, searching for the right words to describe the past events.

He had left the car.

He had been stabbed.

He had shot the murderer.

He was still alive.

Did that mean he had won?

"L? Are you alright?"

There was the crash. The crunch and the horrible grinding sound as the murderer's car slammed into theirs.

There was the man. Tall, tanned, slick bald, his dark brown eyes devoid of all humanity.

Lynda, screaming in that monster's grasp.

Then…there was the fear.

Oh, the fear. It gnawed at his insides and clouded his mind. He wanted nothing more than to stay in the car, plug his ears and close his eyes until it was all over. His heart had been pounding, he felt sure he was going to be killed, but…something wouldn't let him stand by. Not while that monster was there…

The machine's beeping had picked up speed. L had dug his fingers into the sheets, all color draining from his face.

"L?"

L jerked back to reality.

"I'm…I'm okay," he said shakily. He took a deep breath and explained what he had done, first to Watari, then to the police, then to an attorney.

When he was released from the hospital, he was informed that Lynda's parents had been shot by the murderer. When he got angry for not having been told, Watari simply said that he was not allowed to tell until now, which seemed to pacify him. His face changed into one of thought before he spoke again.

"Why did he shoot them, but he was gonna stab Lynda?"

Watari shook his head.

"I don't know what goes on in people's minds, L. I really don't."

L nodded. Then, his whole face brightened.

"Lynda can come to Whammy's House with us!" he shouted, then clapped his hands over his mouth.

"Yeah, that was probably a stupid idea," he admitted. "I'm sorry."

Watari smiled as the two of them walked toward the car.

"Actually L, that was exactly what I was thinking.


	14. Dreamer

**A/N **I thought this chapter up when I got a review saying I needed L to have more grown-up conversations with Watari. It's more of a monologue on L's part, but still…enjoy!

"Watari?"

Watari looked up from the newspaper.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Do you think I'm as smart as an adult?" L asked, scratching under his cast. It would never stop bugging him these days.

"Smarter, if you want my opinion."

"Then how come nobody treats me like one?"

Watari was confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Even you do it, Watari. You treat me like a kid all the time for no reason. I'm not stupid, Watari. I know you could have told me about Lynda's parents earlier. Do you think I couldn't take it? Because if you don't, you're wrong. Do you think it'll give me nightmares? Because it didn't. I have plenty of other stuff to do that for me."

L looked straight at Watari, utter seriousness in his somber black eyes.

"Sometimes I still have the one where you make me go back to the orphanage, you know. It's never really gone away, but some other ones have taken its place. But the dreams are nothing- the real nightmare begins when I open my eyes and watch the morning news."

Watari was taken aback. "What do you mean?"

"Every day I watch the news to see what's going on. All I see are new murders, kidnappings, bombings, natural disasters…" his voice trailed away. "And it all just leads to more death."

"That's how life is," Watari sighed. "It's all just more heartache."

L pounded his fist on the table, knocking over his almost empty glass of strawberry milk.

"That is _not _how life is!" he shouted. "First you treat me like a child, and then you tell me there's no hope!"

"L, I never said that."

"You just did!" L narrowed his eyes.

"Some of life is painful. I should know that at my age. In fact, I can assume that there's a lot of it. but part of it is good. Even during the Holocaust, the birds still sang over the concentration camps. The sun always rose in the morning. there was still a rainbow after a storm. People still had _hope. _And as long as you have hope, they haven't truly defeated you. and as long as there is a single feeble ray of sunshine, there is hope."

Watari was silent.

"I think a day will come when people will finally understand that the bad things they do hurts people. I think once they understand that, they'll want to help people. Then everyone will be kinder to people like me, who maybe walk different, or talk different or maybe think differently, and then the whole world would be better."

L looked down.

"Maybe I'm crazy. Maybe I'm just a dreamer. But I really hope that someday that will happen. And if I keep hoping, as long as I'm alive, my dream will never really die."

Watari was silent.

"I…really underestimated you, L," he said finally.

L looked up.

"You're absolutely right. And I was wrong to treat you like a child. I'm sorry."

L's face lit up.

"There's nothing to apologize for, Watari," he said, grinning. "But I hoped that you would say that!"

**A/N: **reviews, comments/criticisms are always appreciated! But no flames, please. BTW, after _The Story of L_ is finished, I'll be debuting a new story called _The Whammy's House Boys_. So, check it out once I publish it, please?


	15. New Case

It didn't take long before L got a call to another case, this time somewhere in France. It was frightening and exciting at the same time to be in a place where nobody spoke English and everybody seemed to look at him with a combination of condescension and loathing.

On the drive to the new task force, L stared at the Eiffel Tower, glowing beautifully in the moonlight, managing to stand out among all of the other buildings.

He bit his thumbnail thoughtfully, his eyes focused on the tower.

_I wonder…if the Eiffel Tower ever feels weird standing out so much. It's kind of hard to miss._

He laughed.

"Mind sharing the joke?" Watari asked.

"I was…eh, it's nothing."

L went back to looking out the window.

_Sometimes I think the strangest things._

He shook his head, tired of being unable to understand his own mind. Then he smiled.

_So what? Even if I confuse myself a lot, at least I know I'm not the only one. _

When they reached the headquarters, (a five-star hotel in the middle of Paris) he was tired and more than a little bored. He was eager to get out of the car and go with Watari to get some ice cream. He licked it, grinning at Watari as they walked to meet the others.

The one closest to L looked down on him with contempt.

"What is this _brat _doing here?"

"_I'm _the new head of the task force!" L yelled defiantly.

"You? You're just a kid!"

"I'm almost fourteen years old! I am _not _just a kid!"

Watari put a hand on L's shoulder.

"Don't listen to him, L." he looked up at the man. "You agreed to let him onto the task force. If you don't like it, there's a door right over there."

The man sighed.

"Fine, fine!" He shouted. "No use arguing, anyway."

**A/N **as always, reviews are appreciated.


	16. Alphonse and Apolline

**A/N **I recently received a critique from one of my trusted reviewers saying I was buying into the French Stereotype. I would like to apologize to anyone who may have been offended by that. Being part French myself, I can see why people would be upset. But I am writing from experience, so please bear with me. Thank you! ;D

L let out a laugh. He should have been working (there _was _the little matter of a serial killer on the loose), but he couldn't stop himself.

He had had an interesting experience here in France. The people had started out seeming cold and a little harsh, but once he had spent a little time with them, he had found he liked these people best of all. They laughed easily and made some of the best sweets he had ever tasted.

He was learning how to speak French from the eldest member of the force, a tall, rather bulky man by the name of Baptiste, who had stark gray eyes and a magnificent handlebar moustache. At first, he couldn't stand being around the man, but now, a few days later, he was practically rolling on the floor as the man recounted the various (and often disastrous) exploits of his grandchildren, Alphonse and Apolline. It hadn't been the original direction of the conversation, but after a few questions about his home life, Baptiste seemed unable to help himself.

"S-so, le-let me get th-this st-straight," he said in between giggles. "They covered the dog in glue and stuck him on their neighbor's _cat? _What on earth would they do that for?"

"They wanted to make them be friends," Baptiste chuckled. "And, when you're four years old, I guess it makes more _sense _to glue them together."

L shook his head.

"Kids. What can you do?"

Watari opened the door.

"L," he said gravely. "You need to come here. It's important."

**A/N **as always, please review! Sorry the chapter's short. Please don't kill me D:


	17. Where Is God?

"What's wrong?" L asked, shutting the door behind him and Baptiste and looking up at Watari.

"Baptiste," Watari began nervously, "L… I don't want to have to tell you this, but I think you need to know. Baptiste, when was the last time you saw your grandchildren?"

"Last week, why does it matter?"

"Because they're both dead."

XxXx

"How… why?"

L stared in abject horror at the bloody scene before him. Medics zipped up the two small, broken bodies, soaked in gore and unrecognizable. The parents, alive but just barely, were carried away on stretchers. Baptiste was pale, trembling with unspoken anguish.

L clenched his fists and looked upwards.

"He doesn't care, does he?" L asked. "God doesn't care at all. Why does he let this happen? Where is he? Where is the justice? For God's sake, where is God?"

L felt angry, sad, hurt, confused, all at the same time. All this for people he had never even met. He couldn't even begin to comprehend the depth of their grandfather's grief. L reached out and touched Baptiste's shoulder.

"I'm sorry about Apolline and Alphonse," he said quietly, afraid he might cry.

That night, L was haunted by the scene.

Was this what the world was like? Was it only full of hurt and suffering, with people only ever harming and taking advantage of others? Was their truly any goodness in the world?

Was L himself even good?

**A/N **sorry it's been awhile- but please review!


	18. We Got Them

L sat picking halfheartedly at a piece of cake. Baptiste had not shown up again since his son and grandchildren had died, and L was starting to miss him.

Watari handed him a phone.

"Hello?"

"_L, is that you?"_

"Baptiste!" L shouted happily. "It's good to hear from you again. So…are you quitting the task force now?"

"…_No. I want to catch the person who's done this. I just…need some time to sort some things out, okay."_

"Sure. So why did you call me?"

"_I just wanted to hear your voice again. You've become like a second son to me, L."_

"I appreciate it, Baptiste. I'm looking forward to seeing you again."

L grinned as he looked through the evidence with renewed zeal.

"_What are you doing now, L?" _Baptiste asked.

"Right now I'm just analyzing the data. I haven't found anything substantial yet, but I'm willing to stake my life on the fact that the murder of your family is retribution for your involvement in the investigation. I'd also be willing to bet that there's a gang behind these crimes; which means that we're looking for more than one person. At least twenty would be my guess, which would explain the unprecedented scope of the crimes."

"_So…a gang? A gang is behind this whole thing?" _Baptiste was quickly getting angry.

"Yes," L replied, flipping through a sheet of paperwork. "Unlike the last case I worked on, there seems to be no specific method by which these victims meet their deaths. However, they all have one thing in common- they're all fairly well to do middle class citizens. Each home was ransacked after the killings. However, nothing in your home was stolen, correct?"

"_That's right."_

"That is what serves to confirm my theory that your family's murder was retributive. It was their way of saying: _'look at me. I can kill anyone precious to me, and you can't do a single thing about it. You might as well give up now.' _It's a way they use to make themselves feel important. Do you understand me?"

"…_Yes. I understand completely."_

L read through a paper that caught his eye. He fell silent.

"…_L? Are you alright?"_

"…"

L stared in shock. The answer had been looking him straight in the face this whole time, and he hadn't noticed it! How could he be so _stupid? _It was so utterly obvious now!

"_L! Are you feeling alright? You're overworking yourself."_

"…I'm just fine. Baptiste…I know who the killers are."

"_Wait, how…"_

L hung up the phone and turned on the television. The pretty, buxom weatherwoman was just finishing her report.

"_Back to you, Angeline," _she said, a big, fake grin plastered onto her flawless face.

"_Thank you, Marguerite. In other news, three more killings have been reported today. Authorities still have no leads as to who could be behind these heinous crimes."_

_Not for much longer,_ L thought.

He looked at the screen. There it was. Those two peculiar puncture marks. They had been on every body they had found so far. They looked like snakebites. There was only one gang in France who would leave such peculiar marks on their already maimed victims.

Les Vipères. The Vipers. They were known for leaving such marks on _living _victims, but L didn't think it would be much of a stretch to assume they used their twisted little calling card to mark their dead.

"Watari," L said, feeling his adrenaline building. "I know who the murderers are."

XxXx

Baptiste looked flustered. He was ready to barge in on that gang of cutthroats at any moment. L had never seen a man get so angry.

""We have plenty of weapons and reinforcements. It should be no trouble to storm their headquarters and take them down right there. _Before _they kill anybody else," Watari said.

"Let's go!" L shouted impatiently.

"No, L," Watari chided. "_You _will be staying here at headquarters where it's safe. It's too dangerous to get you involved any more than you already are."

"_Watari," _L whined.

"I will not hear any more on this subject, L. You will stay here where it's safe. I am _not _running the risk of you getting hurt. Do you understand me?"

L huffed.

"Fine. I'll stay here."

Baptiste ruffled L's hair.

"Don't worry," he told him. "It'll turn out alright.

"Pop one of 'em in the teeth for me," L said, grinning mischievously.

"Consider it done."

XxXx

L paced the floor, keeping the television on and a phone nearby in case anything came up.

It took hours, but the phone finally rang.

"Watari!" he exclaimed in relief. "How are you? Is everyone okay? Did you catch them?"

"_Yes, L." _Watari sounded out of breath, but otherwise okay. _"We got them. I'm coming back to get you."_

**A/N WOOO! Another win for L! **

**QUESTION: I'll be publishing **_**The Wammy's House Boys **_**as soon as **_**The Story of L **_**is finished. I am planning on having MattxMello in it. Is this a good idea? REVIEW!**


	19. Going Home

**A/N thanks to everyone who reviewed and favorited! It makes me feel so loved! **

L was absolutely ecstatic. One more case solved. He had done it. He had actually done it! Words could not describe his joy.

He hugged Watari over and over again in limitless joy. He gave Baptiste a small smile.

"…We did it."

Baptiste gave L a hug of his own.

"Thank you," he said fervently.

L shook his head. "It's not me you should be thanking. If it weren't for Watari, I wouldn't be here at all." He grinned at Watari. "I'd still be rotting in that orphanage."

"Orphanage?" Baptiste looked confused.

"Where did you think I came from?" L asked, cocking his head in a sort of vague amusement.

"Well…I always assumed you were a relative of Watari's." L laughed.

"Nope."

L bade goodbye to the task force and boarded his flight home. Leaning against Watari's shoulder, he fell asleep and rested easily, knowing he had done well. It was a nice feeling, knowing he had saved lives, that he had brought justice to those who had not made it. It was amazing.

_Whether or not there's a God of this world, _he thought, _there __**is **__justice. And as long as there's always someone there to seek it, it will always prevail in the end. This means that as long as I'm alive, evil can never win. I'll make sure of it._

Watari watched as L slept, smiling at the contented look on his face. He looked so peaceful, and he so rarely got to rest. Now that he thought about it, Watari could do with a little nap as well. Leaning back in his chair, he closed his eyes.

**A/N sorry, you don't get to find out HOW they caught the bad guys yet! That's for NEXT chapter! Thanks for reading! Please review!**


	20. Nightmares

"L's back!"

The other children of Wammy's house swarmed L the moment he walked through the door. Though he was dirty, tired and jet lagged, he offered them a tired smile and humored the children and reading to them.

Watari yawned and headed to his room.

"Glad to see you both made it back in one piece, Quillsh."

"Hello, Roger."

"Well?" Roger asked. "How did it go?"

"Just fine. L seemed to handle the situation quite well. It makes me proud."

Roger patted his friend's back.

"Glad to hear it. How did he figure this one out? I'm curious."

Watari shrugged.

"Let's just say that L has a remarkable ability to notice little details that most other people would miss."

"How did you apprehend the criminals?"

"We…we just stormed the criminals at their hideout. When we ordered them to surrender, they resisted, and it degenerated into a war zone. We had a shootout right there at their headquarters, but we got them in the end. As if it could have been any other way."

"How many people died?"

"Five of our men were wounded, but none of the injuries were fatal. The criminals lost twenty of their men."

Roger looked at Watari with a serious expression.

"Does L know about any of this?" he asked.

"…No."

"You know how he'd react if he found out that so many people died, right?"

"Yes."

"Do you intend to _ever _tell him what happened?"

"He seems content with how things worked out. I won't be the one to spoil his mood. If he's happy, let him be happy. And if he ever asks…I'll tell him the truth. Hopefully, he won't think any less of me when he finds out."

"That makes sense to me. What's he doing now?" Roger asked.

Watari led him back into the playroom, where L was reading to the children from a well-worn volume of _Sherlock Holmes._

"Which Story are you reading, L?" Watari asked

L looked over at him, grinning from ear to ear.

"The Red-Headed League," he replied, before getting back to reading to the throng of the children, breathing life into the words he spoke, keeping his miniature audience enthralled.

Watari yawned again.

"I'm tired, Roger. I'm going to bed."

XxXx

"Watari?"

L shook Watari awake, still calling his name.

"Watari, I need to talk to you."

Watari moaned and sat off.

"What's the matter, L?" he asked. L looked as if he might burst out crying at any moment.

"Watari…" his voice trailed off as his lower lip trembled.

"What's wrong?"

"I…I had a nightmare." He looked at Watari with those somber, coal black eyes, filled to the brim with unshed tears, and Watari could tell that L was putting forth an immense effort to keep them under control. "Watari, I have to know. Did you kill anybody when you took _Les Vipères _down?"

"…Yes. We did. About twenty of them died."

L raised his hand to cover his quivering chin, nodding slowly and blinking rapidly.

"…I'm sorry, L."

L shook his head.

"It's…it's alright. It's just…my nightmare…was…well, they all got killed. I just… I had to know…what had happened…what _really _happened."

"Are you alright, L?"

L stood for a moment before throwing himself into Watari's arms, letting the tears fall, dampening Watari's flannel pajamas, his tiny body racked with silent sobs.

Watari rubbed L's back gently.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"…I hate it when people die," he groaned. "I know it's only part of life, but I just can't stand hearing about people dying. I guess I'm crazy. Or maybe it's because I'm scared to die…"

L felt like a child crying like this, but he couldn't stop himself. He kept sobbing until the tears were gone, leaving him trembling and weak.

Watari held him until he was calm, stroking his hair gently.

"I…I'm going back to bed now," L said, feeling a bit awkward. "Goodnight, Watari."

"Goodnight, L."

L closed Watari's door behind him, running a hand through his thick, dark hair and sighing.

"What's wrong with you, L?"

L turned around.

"Oh, hi, Beyond. What are you doing up?"

Beyond just stared at L with his wide, red eyes.

"Why were you crying?" he asked.

"It's…it's nothing. I was just…it was just a nightmare."

Beyond continued to fix L with that unnerving gaze, head cocked to one side, his expression unreadable.

"What are you doing up?" L asked again.

"The same reason you are. I had a nightmare." Beyond tilted his head to the other side. "It's kind of immature, I know. But I have a lot of nightmares."

"Yeah. Go back to bed."

**A/N I wrote this while listening to a reading of "Death Note: Another Note", so I decided to put BB in here. anyway, please review!**


	21. Beyond Birthday

**A/N This is what insomnia does to you. Just a little bit of fluffy-type filler.**

L stretched as he woke up, the sun barely beginning to peak above the horizon. There had been no more nightmares after the first, and he slept away the rest of the night in peace.

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in," L said.

The door opened, and Beyond walked into the room.

"Good morning, L," he said, a grin plastered on his face. "Did you sleep alright?"

L was confused. Beyond had seemed so cold the night before, but now he was smiling as if he was the happiest child in the world.

"Yeah. How about you?"

"Just fine."

L rolled out of bed, scratching his head.

Beyond ran up and captured L in a tight hug. He clung onto L as if he would never let go.

"Are you going to be staying now, L?"

"Who knows? Whenever they need me again, I'll get called out."

"How long will you be gone?"

"I don't know. A few months, maybe."

It was hard to describe the look in Beyond's eyes then. Anger? Disappointment, maybe?

"I don't like it when you leave," he said bitterly.

L wasn't sure how best to respond. There was something about Beyond that was unnerving him. He couldn't identify, but chilled him to the core.

"Would you like to go get some breakfast?" L asked, in an attempt to break the silent. Beyond agreed.


	22. Finally

"Come on, Beyond, are you gonna eat the French toast or are you just gonna stare at it?"

"Sorry."

Beyond picked up a fork, stabbed a piece of French toast, and ate it.

"L, Why do you solve these cases?" Beyond asked. "Is it justice, or are you just bored?"

"A little from column A, and a little from column B," L admitted, putting more powdered sugar on his toast. "I hate being bored, and I suppose I'd use any means to achieve an end, but when it comes right down to it, I don't like it when someone gets hurt and there's no justice for them."

Beyond leaned forward, resting his head in his hands and fixing L with a wide-eyed, unnerving stare.

"Can I tell you a secret?" he asked.

"Um…sure. Go right ahead."

"Promise you won't tell anyone?"

"I promise."

Beyond leaned in closer.

"I can see people's lives. They're right above their heads, just sort of floating there."

L looked confused.

"What do you mean, Beyond?" he asked.

"I can see _your _life too, L," Beyond said. "And A's. I can see the lives of everyone here."

"Beyond, what do you man you can see their lives?"

"I can see how long they're going to live. I know when they're going to die." Beyond said it all without blinking an eye or acting as if what he was saying was abnormal at all. He just

continued to give L that unnerving stare that seemed to cut right down to his soul.

"A doesn't have very much longer."

L gave Beyond a stern look.

"What are you saying, Beyond? Why would you make something like this up?"

"I'm not making it up! I swear it's true!" Beyond said indignantly. "I can see yours floating above your head right now!"

his voice became calm again.

"Would you like me to tell you how long you've got to live?"

"I'll pass, thank you. I'd like my date of death to be a surprise until then."

Beyond's eyes narrowed.

"Of course," he said. "I understand perfectly. Sorry I asked."

L continued to watch Beyond as they finished their breakfast in silence. Beyond let his gaze wander around the room, eyes moving lazily back and forth. Eyes…those disturbing, blood red eyes. There was something…inhuman about them.

L took their empty plates and left them in the sink.

"Thank you, L."

L turned around to look into those eyes again.

"Oh? It was nothing."

"Good morning, L. Good morning, B."

"Oh, hi A. did you sleep okay?"

"Yes. I slept fine. How about you two?"

"Well enough," L replied. He cast a glance over to Beyond. He was…smiling? No…_smirking _would probably be a better term for the expression. Though his shaggy black hair mostly hid his eyes, L could have sworn they were glowing as he looked at a point a little bit over A's head.

Could Beyond have been telling the truth? Was he really able to see people's lives? And if he _was _telling the truth, was A's life really about to end?

"L, are you alright?"

L pulled his thoughts back to reality.

"Yeah, sorry. I was just daydreaming, that's all. Now then, would you like something to eat?"

"No thank you. I'm not hungry."

"Suit yourself. You should really get going, your classes will be starting soon."

A nodded and walked on down the hallway.

"You should go too, Beyond. Beyond?"

Beyond stood where he was, trembling, making small noises that sounded like whimpers. Was he crying?

"Are you okay, Beyond?"

The noises grew louder, and it became clear that he was not crying.

He was laughing.

"What's so funny?" L asked.

"…Today is the day. It's _finally _here."

"What are you talking about?" L found the whole situation highly disturbing.

"Today is the day that he finally dies!

**A/N as always, reviews are loved!**


	23. God Refuses to Help

**A/N OVER ONE HUNDRED REVIEWS AND FIVE HUNDRED FAVES! WOOT! I LOVE YOU PEOPLE! FREE L PLUSH TOYS FOR ALL! *throws L plushies into the air* Thank you all so much, I really appreciate it! :D**

"…Dead? But how…"

Watari shook his head.

"I just don't know, L. I just don't know. From the looks of it, he fell out of a window, but-"

L took off running.

"Where are you going?" Watari called after him.

"To do some detective work!"

XxXx

"B! I need to talk to you!"

L found Beyond outside on the playground, sitting on a swing and licking strawberry jam off his fingers from a jar on his lap. He looked up at L with vague interest.

"Jam?"

"No thank you. Beyond, there's something really important I need to talk to you about."

"What is it?"

L was taken aback by the look of sweet, unknowing innocence on Beyond's face, so different from how he had seen it before, contorted in sick amusement.

"What's wrong?"

"How did you know?" L asked.

"Know what, L?"

"How did you know what would happen to A?"

Beyond shrugged.

"I already told you. I can see when people are gonna die," he said. "Do you still not believe me, L?"

L was baffled.

_Was he telling the truth? _he thought. _Can he really see when people are going to die? No…there has to be some other explanation…but…that doesn't explain…_

"I have to go now," L said, before turning and leaving.

Police sirens droned in the background when L finally got to see A's broken body. Covered in his own blood, he was lifeless and cold, his spirit flown past the world of the living.

L almost cried, but instead, something strange happened to him. Rather than feeling sorrow, he felt as if all emotion had been drained out of him, leaving him as hollow and as cold as the corpse of the teenage boy being loaded into a body bag. No spirit. No heart. Just an empty shell.

Beneath it all there was an undercurrent of confusion, a puzzlement at this strange new sensation. Was this what a man felt like the moment before he went insane?

Blank.

Roger put a hand on L's shoulder.

"I guess you must feel pretty bad about this."

"…"

"Do you think it might have been murder?"

"No. I thought that at first, but there's no doubt about it in my mind. This was a suicide."

_Because I don't want to believe that the sweet, innocent Beyond Birthday that I just talked to is the same one who laughed at the very thought of A's death,_ L thought bitterly, not daring to say it out loud. _Because I want to believe that B is a good kid. They're only ten years old, too young to do things like this. Where is the justice in A's death? Just another time when God doesn't care and refuses to intervene to stop someone from getting hurt._

"How can you be so sure?" Roger asked.

_Because A had been acting strange for months, but I never thought anything of it until it was too late to save him, _L thought.

"…I just know," was what he said.

**A/N and so begins L's slow but inevitable descent into the cynical, emotionless detective we all know and love. Please review.**


	24. Logically

No tears. No, L didn't cry. He simply held onto Watari's hand and watched as they buried the boy who had so much potential. So much hope. So many dreams. Dreams he would now never achieve.

Why? Why did he have to die so young? If there was a god, why did he allow these things to happen? Maybe there wasn't a god at all.

Yeah, that had to be it. No god would allow the innocent to die like this. Would not allow the innocent to suffer. Would not stand idly by as the world slowly rotted.

So, logically, there couldn't be a god.


	25. Anyone Else

**A/N this story will contain one-sided BxL yaoi. You no like it, don't read it.**

L lay on his bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. He no longer cared about anything anymore. He would stay here for the rest of his life if he could.

There was a knock at his door.

"Come in," he said.

Beyond opened the door and walked up to sit on the bed beside L.

"Are you okay?" he asked, voice sincere but eyes smirking.

"…"

"You miss A, don't you? I know how you feel. I miss him, too. But at least we're still here. We're still alive, and that's a good thing, right?"

L sighed.

"I guess so," he said.

Beyond lay down and snuggled close to L, nuzzling his face into L's neck.

"It'll be alright. I promise."

L blushed. Beyond was way too close.

"Beyond, could you please give me a little space?"

Beyond pressed himself in tighter against L.

"Just let me make you feel better, okay?" Beyond asked.

He rested his chin on the juncture of L's neck and shoulder.

"Don't worry about a thing," he said. "I'll always be here to comfort you, L. because I like you."

_Because I __**love **__you, _he thought, but didn't dare to speak aloud. He didn't know how L would react if he admitted that just yet. A (his _favorite___student) was still fresh in his mind. But B would make him forget.

_I'll make sure I'm the only one he ever thinks about. Can't you see it, L? I want to be the center of your world. I want __**you. **__Please want me back. That's all I want. To make you forget all about A. I want to get to know you better than the likes of him. I want to be the only one you care about. Not any of the cases you work on, not anybody else in this orphanage. Just me._

He wrapped his arms around L, who remained immovable.

Unemotional.

Unfeeling.

_Just wait, L. Someday you will be __**mine.**_

XxXx

"This the kid?" the mercenary asked.

"Yep. A genuine photograph of L Lawliet stolen from Wammy's House. You think you can handle him?"

"Piece of cake. The kid's as good as dead."

XxXx

Beyond watched the sun set behind the mountains through a stained glass window, distorting everything and turning the outside world all sorts of interesting hues.

L was reading to the other children, but Beyond wasn't listening. He never had any patience for storytelling.

Beyond laid down and stretched himself out on the floor. His eyes drifted closed, he was just about to fall asleep…

_**CRASH!**_

There was a bang, then the shattering of the ornate glass window. Then a sharp, sudden gasp.

Beyond shot upward just in time to see L slump over in the velvet armchair, blood pouring freely from a hole in his chest.

**A/N CLIFFHANGER! MUAH! HA! HA! *ahem* please review. A note about my Naruto stories, won't let me publish or update anything in the Naruto category for some reason. Sorry.**


	26. Don't Let Me Die

_Blood pours out of me, my life draining away._

_Sharp, stinging pain, too much to bear._

_My lungs are useless-I cannot breathe._

_My eyes are useless-I cannot see._

_My mind is useless- I cannot think._

_I hear the screams of people around me. Voices I recognize. Mello…Matt…Beyond…Watari._

_A…if I die, is there a place where I can join him? Or is there only darkness after death? A dull void where all life ceases to exist. Oh God, the very thought terrifies me._

_Oh God, if you're out there…please don't let me die. _

_I just want to live._


	27. Pull Through

Beyond was furious. How could somebody do this to L?

Watari and Roger looked panicked as an ambulance arrived and took L to the hospital. They were not sure if he would live or die. How could this have happened? L was supposed to be _his! _They were supposed to be together! How could anybody take away what was rightfully _his?_

Beyond wept his tears of anger, silently vowing to make sure that the criminal responsible would _pay, _and pay _dearly._

XxXx

Mello was on the verge of hysterics, clinging to Matt, his lifeline to sanity. Blonde hair mingled with red as they held each other close, Mello blubbering like an infant, Matt biting back all his tears.

"L…L will be fine," Matt assured his friend. "He's tough- getting shot won't kill him."

"But what if it _does?" _Mello wailed. "That's how my family was killed! Who says that it won't kill L, too? Oh, I couldn't live through that!"

Matt silenced his friend with a hug.

"Whatever happens, Mello, don't worry. As long as you're my friend, I won't let anything upset you, I promise."

XxXx

Watari paced back and forth on the outside of the operating room, wringing his hands, worry gnawing at his mind. This boy- L- was like his own child. he couldn't lose him. He must have recited every prayer to every God he'd heard of, pleading for the life of this child.

Minutes turned into hours, until finally a doctor came out of the room.

"Is he…will he…" Watari suddenly seemed unable to articulate.

"The boy's fine. We've managed to stabilize his condition, and we have him in the ICU if you want to go in and see him."

Watari followed the doctor, but wasn't prepared for what he saw.

L was hooked up to a breathing machine, a thick layer of blood-soaked gauze over his chest.

"The bullet collapsed his lung and grazed the side of his heart," the doctor explained. "He has a good chance of survival now, but recovery will take awhile. Have you filled out the police report yet?"

"Yes, I've gone through all the necessary procedures."

"Good. All we can do now is wait to see if the little guy pulls through. How old is he?"

"About fourteen."

"_All we can do is wait to see if the little guy pulls through."_

Yes…that was all they really _could _do.

They'd just have to wait.

_Please pull through, L, _Watari pleaded with the child in his mind. _You're strong. You can make it._

_Please don't let me down._

**A/N please leave a review! Constructive criticism is loved!**


	28. Welcome Back

L was almost unrecognizable, laying in that hospital bed, an oxygen mask covering his face. An IV that ran into his arm dripped nutrients slowly into his bloodstream, his body hooked to various machines that kept him alive.

It had been almost three weeks, and his eyes still hadn't opened.

Watari visited every day, often spending the night by his side, watching the mask fog up every time the child breathed.

Four weeks passed…then two months…perhaps he wouldn't wake up…

Finally, almost three months later, when Watari had given up all hope, he heard a noise. A tiny, fragile, quiet noise, but it came from the broken body beside him.

L's eyes slowly fluttered open, and he moaned.

His head hurt, his chest ached, and his throat felt like sandpaper.

Watari's heart caught in his throat. He ran shouting for a doctor, tears of relief falling freely from his face.

XxXx

L smiled weakly at Watari. Watari took the child's fragile hand, closing his eyes, giving silent thanks to God.

"…Welcome back," he whispered.

**Reviews and critique will always be welcome in my stories !**


	29. Hypocrisy

**Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't be using "The Story of L" for shipping purposes, but, in my opinion, yandere BB is too much fun to pass up! XD**

"…I lived," L said, mystified. He brought a hand up to his chest, where the bullet had penetrated him. "How did I survive?"

"God didn't want you to die yet," Watari said.

L's face became dark.

"Don't talk to me about God," he said. "I've already decided that a God can't exist. There's no way a being that is proclaimed to be perfect and wise could be so cruel and outright hypocritical."

"L, what do you mean?"

"He lets me, who has no family, survive when all odds say that I should have died, and then proceeds to kill two innocent children, along with their parents. He lets millions suffer while a few live in the lap of luxury. Somewhere out there, a person got shot that didn't survive. It makes no sense, so I assume that there is no God which controls our affairs."

Watari was temporarily speechless.

"L, consider what you're saying for a moment."

"Oh, I _have, _Watari," L said darkly. "He _can't _exist, because Alphonse, Apolline, and thousands of other people every day die without cause or justice."

Watari couldn't think of a response.

There really wasn't one to give.

XxXx

Beyond paced the floor anxiously, muttering rapidly under his breath.

"Who could've done something like this?" Beyond mumbled. "How could someone hurt _my _L? well, I'll just have to hit them right back, won't I? Yeah, I'll have to find out who they are and get them back for what they've done."

But that could wait until _his _little L was better again.

Besides, right now, Beyond wanted some strawberry jam.

**Please take the time to review/ leave some constructive criticism :D**


	30. Going into Hiding

**Before reading this, I would like to ask a favor of all readers. If you notice something in my story that you don't like, or that you think could be better, please do not hesitate to tell me. That being said, if there's something that you like, or something you would like me to put in the story, I'm always open to new ideas. Thank you in advance, and enjoy the story!**

The first thing L did when he got home from the hospital was take his laptop and lock himself in his room. Watari knocked for a solid twenty minutes before he finally decided that it was best to leave him alone for the time being.

He heard mechanical clicking, and L murmuring to himself, along with the almost constant _tap tap tapp_ing of computer keys.

After two and a half days of this, Watari became worried. He pulled on the door handle, which opened, much to his surprise.

L's lamp was on, his head resting on his laptop as he slept, quite clearly exhausted. His skin had a deathly pallor now, sort of like a ghost. Watari shook him awake gently. L awoke with a protesting moan.

"…Wuizzit, Watari?" he slurred, half-conscious.

"L, what have you been doing?" Watari asked.

L gestured to his computer proudly. The screensaver had been changed to a large, calligraphic letter 'L'.

"I think I've finally figured it out," he said. Watari scratched his head in confusion.

"Figured what out, L?"

"A new way for me to solve cases. A way that lets me keep my identity hidden."

"What is it?"

L tapped a few keys on the keyboard, pulling up various files.

"I created a modulator that disguises my voice, so I can better hide my identity from others. Then, I personally removed any mention of me from any and all public databases. There are no longer any government files on me, either. I also destroyed any photographs of me that I could find. I got in touch with everyone who knows who I am, and they've agreed to keep quiet about me, so, effectively, I no longer exist. Or, should I say that L Lawliet no longer exists. L the detective will, of course, continue his work, albeit from the sidelines."

Watari was dumbstruck, hardly able to believe his eyes/ears.

"Is this what you've been doing for the past two days, L?"

L shook his head.

"That was only the first day. After that point, I've been tracking down my would-be assassins. I'm pretty close, too. It shouldn't take me too much longer. That will tie up any loose ends for me, completely erasing my existence."

Gaping, Watari shook his head in disbelief.

"L, what is this all about?"

L gave Watari a grave look.

"Don't pretend you don't know, Watari," he chided. "I very nearly died when I was shot."

A dark look came to L's eyes, and he suddenly seemed much older, and faraway.

"I realized then that I was afraid to die. I had never been so scared before. Then, I realized that as long as I do what I do, my life is in danger. However, I didn't want to do something foolish like stopping my detective career altogether. Therefore, I decided that I wouldn't stop my detective work, but L Lawliet the boy detective would have to disappear. And…he has."

"L, there has to be a better way to deal with this danger than hiding yourself," Watari pleaded. "Are you sure this is what you want to do?"

"There is no other way," L said firmly. He looked Watari straight in the eye.

"This world is rotten. I have to fix the world by making sure that the people that are making it rot are locked up for good. Still, it's not enough for one person to do alone…the world will always be disgusting…because humanity is disgusting.

Watari suddenly felt a deep sorrow as he remembered the cheerful, idealistic child that he had rescued from that orphanage years ago. He had once said, _"I believe that, no matter what a person's done, or how far they've fallen, they deserve a second chance. Because…everyone, I believe, is inherently good at heart."_

…Was this even the same child? Had he really changed that much?

_Oh, L, _Watari thought sadly. _What's happened to you?_

**Thanks for reading :D **


	31. Near

L's door creaked open. A small, white-haired boy timidly walked inside. L looked up from his computer and smiled.

"Hey, Near, what's up?"

Near hopped onto the bed and scooted in to be closer to L.

"Nothing really. I was just lonely," Near admitted. "You've been in your room a lot lately, haven't you?"

L shook his head.

"I suppose you wouldn't understand., Near. Maybe someday you will."

Near furrowed his brow, like he always did when L said something that he couldn't comprehend.

"I got the best grades in my whole class this term, L," he said proudly.

L ruffled his ashen hair gently.

"Good job, Near. I'm proud of you."

Nears heart leapt. L was proud of him. L was _proud _of him. L was proud of _him! _He closed his eyes briefly, locking those small words of praise deep inside his heart.


	32. Flawless

Beyond walked into L's room without knocking, sitting down on the bed and smiling that sweet, kind smile that had quickly become his trademark.

"What are you doing, L?"

L smiled triumphantly, typing a quick message up on the computer before turning to Beyond.

"I just put my would-be murderers in jail," he said, somewhat smugly. "I also solved fifteen murder cases over the past two weeks alone."

Beyond's eyes went wide with amazement.

"That's so cool," he said. "How did you do that?"

L's smile widened.

"I've become three detectives at once," he said. "I am now L, Eraldo Coil, and Deneuve, all at once."

"How did you do that?"

"I got the _real _Eraldo Coil and Deneuve to give their names to me for the purpose of my investigations."

"How did you do _that?"_

L shrugged.

"Let's just say that I can be persuasive when I want to."

Beyond smiled again.

"Does this mean that you won't be leaving anymore?"

"I most certainly won't be gone as often, seeing as I don't have to be there for half of the cases I work on, as long as I stay behind a computer screen."

Beyond squealed and hugged L tight.

He was angry when he heard about what L was doing at first, but if it meant that he could spend more time with L, then it was more than worth it.

He snuggled up close to L and fell asleep. L smiled, and went back to work, writing messages, examining evidence, making phone calls. It worked so flawlessly. A truly perfect system.

He stroked Beyond's hair gently with the back of one hand.

Carefully, so as not to wake Beyond, he left and got some sweets to eat while he was working, bringing them back up to his room.

Popping a candy into his mouth, L returned to work with renewed vigor.

**Please review! **


	33. My Problem

**I am pleased to announce that **_**The Wammy's House Boys **_**has been published! I is very proud of myself :D**

L had eaten too much.

He groaned and closed his laptop, laying back against his pillow.

He'd been stressed out, working on several difficult cases simultaneously. To take his mind off his frayed nerves, he'd eaten more candy in one sitting than more people would eat in a year. And he was paying the price for it. His stomach really hurt. It felt like he was going to throw up.

A thought suddenly entered his mind. But, no…that was disgusting! Not to mention horrible for your health. He really shouldn't…oh, but his stomach hurt so badly…and he needed to be able to focus on his cases…surely, this one time wouldn't hurt him, and he'd feel so much better afterwards.

He got off the bed, again, careful not to wake beyond, and headed to the bathroom. L locked the door and turned on the fan. Leaning over the toilet, he shoved his toothbrush down his throat.

XxXx

L walked back into his room. Beyond was awake, sitting at the foot of the bed in his imitation of L's crouching position.

"Hey, B," L said, smiling.

"What were you doing?" Beyond asked.

"Nothing."

"It sounded like you were throwing up in there,"

L's heart leapt for a minute, but he brushed the comment off. He simply ruffled Beyond's hair and sent him out of the room before hopping back onto the bed and opening his laptop. He clicked on the various files he had opened, scanning over the information quickly before digging in.

With his stomachache gone, L resumed his work with renewed vigor.

Yes, one time may not have mattered. But, however inadvertently, the same thing happened the next day.

And the next day.

And the next day after _that._

Months passed in this same manner. L knew he'd created a problem for himself. He also knew that he needed to tell Watari.

_There's a one hundred percent chance that he's going to be angry with me, _he thought, biting his thumbnail, which he did so often lately that it had become something of a neurotic habit.

No…that would have to wait until later. Later, when he wasn't so afraid that Watari would yell at him (though he'd never so much as raised his voice whenever L was concerned). Or, maybe, he could deal with the problem on his own, so Watari would never have to know. After all, he'd solved countless problems worse than this on his own before, so why _shouldn't _he be able to solve this one? It was _his _problem, after all. He should deal with it on his own.

**Aw, bulimic L D: I got the idea while browsing the Wild Mass Guessing page on TV Tropes. Well, that combined with my own previous struggles with bulimia. Anyway, please drop a review on your way out, and have a nice day!**


	34. A Righteous Man in a Rotten World

Watari sighed as he walked into L's room at one in the morning to find him still working.

"Aren't you going to get some rest, L?" he asked.

"Not yet," L said. "This case is really important. I may need to go to the scene of the crime for this one."

Watari frowned.

"You should probably go to sleep, Watari," L continued, changing the subject. "It's not good for someone your age to stay up this late."

Watari chuckled at the slight hypocrisy.

"That reminds me. Why does everyone call you Watari?"

Watari smiled slightly.

"The first children taken in here were three gifted Japanese orphans from World War Two. It's what they called me, and the name stuck."

L nodded.

"That's when you opened this place, then?"

"Yes, it was."

"What made you do it?"

The question caught Watari off guard.

"I…I don't know. My wife and I just decided that these children needed a home. Nobody else would take them, so we decided that…it would be best."

"Hmm…that's interesting. You're a good man, Watari."

L got a distant look again.

"…You're a good man in a rotten world. I admire that, Watari."

"L, what do you mean?"

"I've said it before, Watari." L's voice had become brisk and formal. "This world is rotten, with too many rotten people. That's why I exist. To hunt them down and get rid of them, at all costs to me. I don't matter…it doesn't…matter what happens…to me. because I am justice, and justice never truly dies."

L went back to his work.

"I'd like to head out to this crime scene in the morning, Watari. I've already made arrangements. You should get some rest, so you're ready to go in the morning."

**Review?**


	35. Legacy

L sighed as he got on the plane that would take him home from his latest case, Watari by his side.

It was just standard fare. A couple of murder victims, a runaway killer. He cracked the case in less than a week. It was all so…

_Boring._

L needed something _fun. _Something that would get his mind going, make his blood pump. Like his first couple of cases did. These were just boring. It was like playing a game of Clue when you already knew what the cards in the folder were.

L made a mental note that, from now on, he would only take on the cases that caught his attention. That way, he could keep himself motivated and intellectually stimulated.

…Ten victims…yeah, at least ten victims. Any killer with that many murders under his belt meant serious business. Either that or a million dollars…that meant that the hunt would be all the more rewarding in the end.

The world was too rotten to save, so L figured he might as well have some fun on his fool's errand. If he was going to take part in a futile quest, he might as well enjoy himself while he was able to fight.

This newfound realization made L smile. At least he wouldn't spend the rest of his life bored.

"Why so happy, L?" Watari asked.

"Oh, just proud of a job well done, I suppose," L lied. Watari turned his back to him and fell asleep.

L looked out of the window at the blanket of clouds below him. He bit his thumbnail, narrowing his eyes in thought.

_If the world is truly beyond redemption, then why do I continue to fight? _He thought. _Why bother? _

_Maybe…the world is too rotten to change…but only in my lifetime…but maybe, just maybe, one of my successors will be able to change the world. They may just be able to fix it…either BB or Mello or Near. Maybe even Matt._

_So many maybes…_

_But not enough evidence to be sure of any of them…I'm only 35 percent certain that any of them could…_

He shook his head and smiled again.

_No…percentage doesn't matter here. I'll do my best, leave my legacy behind, and hope they'll pick it up._

He stretched, and slowly fell asleep.

XxXx

"L!"

Beyond ran up and caught L in a tight hug,

"It's so good to have you home!"

L laughed.

"It's good to _be _home, B."

**Review?**


	36. Almost Like a Ghost

L walked back into his bedroom, flicking on the light.

Beyond sat on the bed, staring at him.

"What are you doing here, Beyond?" L asked. "It's two in the morning."

"What were _you _doing in the bathroom?" Beyond replied.

"Well…what do you _think _people do in the bathroom?" L asked, heart skipping a beat. If Beyond knew…

"Whatever," Beyond said angrily.

"Go back to bed, B," L ordered. "I need to finish up an important case."

"No."

Beyond got off the bed, walked over to L, and hugged him.

"I like you L."

"Um…I like you, too, Beyond."

"How much do you like me?"

L was quickly becoming perplexed.

"Please just go to bed, B. We'll talk about this in the morning."

L got back up on the bed, working with the added advantage of an empty stomach. He made a mental note to look into his behavior a little more thoroughly as soon as he got the chance.

_Great. Now I can't focus._

He got off the bed again, walking through the quiet hallways. He peered into the rooms of the other kids.

Near was curled up under the blankets, so small that he might not have been there. In another room, Linda was sprawled lazily across her bed, above her covers like she always was.

In the next room, Matt and Mello were in the same bed, snuggled up close together. They were holding hands. L couldn't help but get choked up a little.

He loved these children. He wanted what was best for these children. But what could he do? Even if he tried his best, he could only do so much. Eventually, they would grow up and leave Wammy's House. When that happened, L would most likely never see them again. And then, what could he do?

What could he do when they were out of his reach?

Sighing, he got some candy from the kitchen and went back to his room.

Doing what he did best.

Staying in the shadows.

Almost like a ghost. Hiding from the world, to fade into oblivion. Nobody would care once he died. In the one-in-a-million chance that he outlived Watari, maybe _he _would care.

But no one else.

**Review?**


	37. Birthday Surprise

…**Eighteen years old…**

Was he really that old?

Yes, he was. At least, if the candles on top of L's birthday cake were anything to go by.

He closed his eyes and blew them out in one breath.

_I wish for a better world_, he thought ruefully.

Mello clapped. Matt cheered. Near merely smiled a little. L broke out into a rare grin as he looked over at Watari. Without that man, he never would have made it this far.

"I love you, Watari."

Watari didn't reply.

XxXx

"Hey, B. What do you want?"

Be smiled at L timidly, before walking up to him and hugging him.

"I have a birthday present for you," he said.

L cocked his head.

"What is it?"

"Kneel down."

L obeyed.

"Now close your eyes."

"Okay."

"No peeking."

Beyond knelt down to L's height, leaned forward, and kissed him.

**Sorry this chapter is so short. My dad blocked most of my websites, and I only have thirty minutes on the computer before it times out DX anyone know how to get past that?**


	38. Unrequited

**Uber-thanks to my Beta, who's the only reason that I can still publish on this website :D**

L pushed Beyond away. Beyond walked right back up and tried to kiss him again.

"…B, stop it!"

Beyond had a hurt look on his face.

"I love you, L."

L stayed there for a moment, unsure of how to respond. Then, he stood up, dusted himself off, and ruffled Beyond's hair nervously.

"Beyond," he began, "You're a really nice boy, but you know I can't love you back."

Beyond glared, anger evident on his face.

"Why not?" he demanded.

"Well…I'm a boy…"

"Yeah?"

"And _you're _a boy…"

"So?"

L pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Listen, B. I like you a lot. But I can never like you in _that _way, understand? It just…you're younger than me, we're both male…it just wouldn't work."

"Who gives a damn if we're both male?" Beyond shouted. "Who decided that it's wrong to be in love with someone just because they're the same gender? It doesn't make any sense to me! Who made up that stupid rule in the first place?"

"B…"

"I love you, L. would that have been a problem if I was a girl?"

"…"

"Well?"

"…I do admit that it would bother me less," L finally admitted. "I'm sorry, B, but it won't work out."

L walked away, leaving Beyond behind.

His head was spinning. He stumbled through the hallway, tripping over an abandoned textbook, hitting the ground hard.

"L, are you alright?"

Watari helped him up. L was paler than normal, and looked extremely confused.

"What happened?"

"He... he... Beyond, he-" L looked up nervously at the aging man, "he kissed me, Watari."

"What did you say in return?"

"I told him that it wouldn't work out. He seemed very angry with me. Watari, what should I do? I feel terrible, and there's a ninety-nine percent probability that Beyond does, as well."

"Don't worry, L. I'll go talk to him."

"Thank you, Watari."

If anyone could talk some sense into Beyond, Watari could.

**Please review, my lovely peoples ^.^**


	39. A Letter

A week had passed since Beyond had kissed L. L had almost forgotten about it completely, when Watari came into his room in a panic, face flushed and breathing heavily.

"What's wrong, Watari?" L asked.

"L, I've been tearing this school apart looking for Beyond. I'm afraid he's gone."

"Gone?"

L jumped up in a panic. "What do you mean?"

"I think he's run away."

"B…"

L ran into Beyond's bedroom, determined to do a little digging.

"What are you doing, L?"

"If Beyond has run away, he will have left some sort of evidence behind. A note, or something- aha! Here we go."

He pulled a letter out of Beyond's nightstand.

_L,_

_I know you'll be the only person smart enough to look for a letter. So I'll write this one especially for you._

_You just wait. I'll get your attention somehow. Someday, when you've forgotten all about me, I will turn your whole world upside down. Just wait. I will do something that not even __you __will be able to see coming. _

_If you will not give me your love, then give me your hate. If I cannot share your happiness, then I will share your misery._

_Love,_

_BB_

L read this out loud to Watari.

"What are you going to do?" Watari asked.

"…Nothing."

"Hmm?"

"Get the police to search for him. But I can't do anything."

He folded the letter neatly and stuck it in his pocket.

"In the meantime, please go inform Near that he is the new number One.

**Well, we all knew this was coming :) Please review :D**


	40. Stories

_"I have a surprise for you."_

_Keep your mind off him, you idiot! There's nothing you can do!_

L told himself that repeatedly whenever Beyond crept into his mind. He'd run away. There was nothing L could do. Not even the greatest detective in the world could comprehend the mind of an unstable and irrational teenage boy.

He forced himself to keep his attention on the cases he was working on.

It was like a juggling act. He started with just one case that had his full attention. Then, he decided three at once was no problem at all. But now, he was working on no less than twenty cases simultaneously.

"_I love you, L."_

_FOCUS! _L screamed in his mind. _The police are already looking for him! There's nothing more that you can do!_

"_I love you. What's wrong with that?"_

He let out a howl of frustration, and slammed his hand down on the keyboard.

_Why did you have to do this to me, Beyond? _

"What's wrong?"

Mello was standing in the doorway, arms crossed.

"Oh, just a little frustrated is all."

"You? Frustrated? That's new." Mello sauntered in and hopped up on the bed, brushing his blond hair out of his face.

"I always thought that you were the kind of guy who could solve any problem."

"I'm not invincible."

"I never said you were."

"Where's Matt?" L asked.

"Playing Mario Golf. I got bored and came to visit."

"Well, what would you like to talk about?"

"Tell me about that Eraldo Coil guy!" Mello said excitedly. "And about Deneuve! How did you get them to give up their names to you?"

"It's kind of a long story," L muttered.

"I've got nowhere to be."

Mello was practically jumping up and down in his excitement.

"C'mon, _please?"_

He looked at L with sparkling eyes, and L relented.

"Fine, I'll tell you the story. But you have to promise not to tell anybody else, okay? Not even Matt."

"Cross my heart!"

L smiled, and launched into his tale, continuing to sift through case files as he did so.

"It started when I was about thirteen, and working on that case in France with that gang."

"I remember that!"

"There was another detective working on the case called Deneuve. Well, he didn't want to take me seriously. I wanted to prove myself, so we made a bet. Whoever solved the case first would get the other person's legacy. The other person's name, their detective code, all that good stuff."

Mello leaned forward, grinning.

"Obviously, I solved the case first. Deneuve was furious, but he kept his word. And thus, I inherited his legacy."

"What about Eraldo Coil?" Mello asked. "How did you get his name?"

"In a similar manner. I very nearly lost that one. But, of course, I won that as well. I got his name and legacy, and the rest is history."

"That's cool."

"That's all you can say?" L asked, looking up from his work.

"There's not much else _to _say. It's amazing. How do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"How did you manage to beat those guys? How do you manage to outsmart some of the smartest people in the world, solve the hardest cases- how do you do that?"

"It's not hard, really. Criminals tend to be frighteningly predictable. It's a simple matter to get inside their heads and find out what they're planning."

"But what about those detectives? What did you do to beat them?"

"They let their emotions get the better of them. That automatically gives your opponent the upper hand."

"Is that how Near always manages to beat me?" Mello asked bitterly.

"Yes, that's exactly how. You could easily outsmart him if you took more time to think before going off half-cocked and making a fool out of yourself."

"You really think so?"

"I know so."

Mello jumped up and threw his arms around L's neck.

"You're great, L!"

He ran out the door.

"Matt! Hey, Matt, you'll never guess what L just told me!"

L watched him go with a tired amusement.

"Cute," He mumbled, as he returned to his work. "Really cute."

**Please review :D**


	41. Lost

In all the years that Beyond had been gone, L had probably been at Wammy's for a total of six months at best. He didn't want to be there. He didn't want to remember.

He solved case after case, sent criminal after criminal to prison. But it wasn't enough. It was never enough.

Because _he just couldn't forget._

Even if he could force Beyond from his memory, there was still the fact that everything he was doing was _absolutely pointless. _The world was still a rotten mess, with criminals running rampant, innocents being hurt. No matter how hard he tried, no matter how much he fought against it, _it was never going to be enough._

No matter how many crime syndicates or human trafficking rings he busted, how many drug dealers he took off the street, _it was not enough._

And L couldn't forget.

So, he did the only thing he knew how to do. It was a trick he had learned when he was younger, but that he only started really using when he decided that he couldn't go running to Watari every time something was bothering him. It was like flipping a switch. Just like that, he could turn his emotions off, and focus on his work. The memories were still there, but they didn't bother him.

He wouldn't _let _them bother him.

At least, until he received the case.

Watari handed him a large manila envelope that had arrived in the mail. He cracked it open, his curiosity peaked.

The pictures inside were almost enough to make him gag.

Bodies, nearly mutilated beyond recognition. One had several bloody gashes in his back. One was missing two limbs. The rest…L couldn't bring himself to look at them. he was used to seeing gory pictures, but it was disgusting at how carefully and deliberately these injuries had been inflicted.

A newspaper article, speaking of killings in Los Angeles.

There was one final picture after all the others. A jar of strawberry jam.

L's heart caught in his throat.

B…

He called Watari.

"Yes?"

"There is a case in Los Angeles that I'm going to take on. I need you to make arrangements to go there immediately.

_"Of course."_

XxXx

Watari hung up the phone, sighing.

L's turn for the stranger had taken its toll on him. He often found himself wondering where that innocent, cheerful, idealistic child that he adopted had gone. He missed that look of pure contentment that he had when he took the first bite of his very first ice cream sundae. The expression of ecstasy when L discovered that he would be getting a home. The sheer satisfaction of having solved his very first case.

Now, he locked himself in a dark room all day, looking through boxes upon boxes of case files, communicating to the world only from behind the safety of a computer screen.

And…Watari couldn't shake the terrible feeling that this was his fault.

L was too young when he began his detective work. Thirteen was too young. Far too young. Watari should have made him wait until he was older. Should have made him be patient.

He was only a child.

But no. He had supported his efforts, encouraged this unhealthy behavior by doing nothing to stop it.

And now, he had lost the most precious thing he had.

This child was no longer a child, but a worn-out and jaded young man who, in the short time he had been alive had seen enough horrors for ten lifetimes' worth of nightmares.

But it couldn't be helped now.

He had to book that plane flight.

**Reviews are always loved ^^  
**


	42. Tired

I'm sorry I had you wait so long for such a short chapter! *bows head in shame* But they will get longer once L gets to the Kira case, I promise!

**~*L*~**

L was tired.

Not tired in the way that he normally felt, but completely and utterly exhausted. Drained of all his strength and concentration.

Exhausted.

Beyond had exhausted him.

He _knew _Beyond was out there. He _knew _Beyond had done this. He knew that Beyond had lost his mind, and had gone on a miniature killing spree as his way of showing L that he did not take well to rejection. A high-cost temper tantrum.

But he also _knew _that this wasn't who Beyond was. Beyond had come to Wammy's House as little more than a frightened child who clung to L at every given opportunity. The way he tried to copy L had made him smile.

And now…

L sighed and pushed his cake away. Suddenly, he wasn't hungry anymore.

He rubbed his temple.

_I can't imagine that things could get any worse._

L's cell phone rang as soon as he completed that thought. He picked it up and answered it.

_"This is Naomi. I have something important to tell you."_

Naomi almost sounded worried. L was more than a little surprised that she would show that much emotion while speaking to him. Did this mean she was starting to like him?

L's cheeks colored red at the thought.

"What is it?"

_"That Ryuuzaki guy who's been working with me these past couple days…I think he's the murderer."_

L wasn't shocked. This merely confirmed his suspicions.

_"He knows so much about this case…and he acts like he's hiding something. I really think it's him."_

"What else do you know about this Ryuuzaki character?" L asked, trying to keep himself in a reasonably calm state.

_"He gave me a place to meet him. I'm going there now. I'll call you back later."_

"Very well. Good luck, and be careful."

_"Thank you, L."_

L paused. Normally, when he told her to be careful, she would merely huff and tell him not to worry. But she had thanked him.

L tried to pretend he wasn't blushing.

_click!_

The line disconnected.

He scratched an itchy spot on his dark-haired head, his face going blank again. his mind drained of those giddy sensations of attraction and affection.

No time to feel emotions.

He still had cases to solve.

**~*L*~**

Please drop a review :D Special thanks to Lady Avaritia, who published this chapter C:


	43. Goodbye, Beyond

I know this update took forever- but I really didn't know what to do. Better a late chapter I'm confident in than an early one I'm not, I suppose. Yeah, a good bit of BB/L in this chapter, though it's still (mostly) nonreciprocating XD. Also, some foreshadowing- cookies to anyone who guesses what it is :3

* * *

Why did it have to end this way? Why…

_Beyond…why did you…how could you? _L's hands were trembling- the world had frozen over. _ You didn't…_

He took a deep breath and entered the hospital room, bracing himself for the worst.

It was…not nearly as bad as he expected. All the wounds were bound in clean white bandages, making it seem only half as bad. Beyond was sound asleep- L didn't have to face those blood red eyes. He could walk right up to the bed, brush Beyond's undamaged hand, and he wouldn't mock him, laugh, scream, or any of those other horrible things.

At least…that was what he hoped.

_"It's all **your **fault!" _

L's head jerked up, heart set pounding with a rush of adrenaline.

"B-Beyond?"

And…it _was _Beyond. Same hair, same handsome face, same scar on his cheek…same eyes. The only difference was, rather than being clothed in hospital garb, he was dressed in a loose black robe that billowed around his body. Hot, angry tears poured down his face, sharp teeth gritted in unconcealed fury. His eyes were wild, glaring with an intensity and a hatred no mortal man could hope to match.

_"All I ever wanted was…was for you to **love **me! I wanted us to be **happy **together! But…but you wouldn't touch me! You wouldn't even **hold **me!"_

The spirit Beyond (or whatever it was) pointed an accusatory finger at L.

_"Always, **always,** I was second best to you! The others laughed at me and called me Backup, because they **knew** you didn't care!"_

L was stunned, unable to do more than stand and take the verbal lashing.

_"You never loved me! You never loved A! You never loved **anyone, **not even yourself!"_

"This is a dream," L told himself, closing his eyes and shaking his head. "All of this, just a dream…"

_"Just a dream, Lawlipop? Is that what you think this is?"_

Beyond took L's face in his hands, forcing him to look up, into those eyes, into that soul he doesn't want to see.

_"Even if you deny this, it doesn't make it any less real."_

He stroked the side of L's face. His hand is soft, and cool.

_"I've heard…that in dreams…you don't feel any sensation," Beyond_ mused. _"That, even if someone touches you, you won't feel a thing. So…"_

Beyond trailed off, bringing L in closer, and pressing their lips together.

Beyond's lips were soft, but there was no warmth left in them. They were like ice against L's mouth, stealing the warmth from him- like he'd stolen his happiness, his security, like he'd stolen his sleep on so many restless nights.

_We don't look so alike anymore, do we, L?_

It was gentler than their last kiss, seeming like an eternity ago. It wasn't demanding anything- only proving a point- that, no matter what, a small part of L would always be Beyond's.

Beyond brought his lips up to L's ear, whispering in low, sultry tones.

_"You're going to fall for someone else," _he whispered, a sneer curling his mouth as he spoke_. "And I mean fall madly, truly, and desperately in love- not that schoolboy crush you have on Miss Misora."_

L tensed up. He knew..?

_"You're going to fall in love, and it's going to hurt you. They're going to string you along, and you're going to let them. They're going to kill you, in the end…"_

Beyond pressed a kiss to the side of L's neck, where his pulse throbbed.

_"Be wary of the person who brings light into your life. They'll be the one to end you."_

Another kiss. This one was rough, dominating. L's world blanked out, and became only Beyond's lips…his tongue…

_"Say it," _Beyond purred, mouth barely apart from L's. _"Tell me…tell me you love me. Try to say there won't ever be anyone else."_

"Beyond-"

More kisses. On his mouth. On his cheek.

His neck.

His jaw.

"Beyond…I do love you."

Beyond paused. His eyes narrowed, body tensing like an agitated cat.

Tears pricked at the corners of L's eyes, but they didn't fall. He wrapped his arms around Beyond, pulling him in close.

"I always loved you…you were like my little brother…"

_"I didn't **want **to be your **brother," **_Beyond spat.

"I know…I'm sorry…"

It was L's turn to kiss Beyond, softly, on the top of his head.

"I'm sorry we couldn't be what you wanted to be. But Beyond…please…please just let it go…you're only hurting yourself."

Beyond growled, shoving at L's chest.

_"I don't want an apology,"_ he spat. _"And I don't want your pity either!_

"I know…"

_"…L…"_

Suddenly, L's arms were empty. He looked down, and the black cloaked Beyond was gone.

The bandaged Beyond was still fast asleep, unaware of anything that had transpired.

Once again, L approached the bed, taking hold of his one good hand.

"Beyond…"

A quick, parting kiss on bruised, burned lips.

"…I'll miss you…

…I'm sorry…"

_In another life, maybe things may have been different. If you had never run away…if I had never…_

_Too many ifs. It's the past…over and done._

_Time to get on with the future._


	44. Not All the Time

**IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is the last chapter of _The Story of L. _It shall be continued in _The Story of L: For the WorLd. _**

**Thanks to all who read and reviewed. Please read the continuation and review this last chapter :P**

**~oOo~**

"L! Welcome back, L!"

L gave a tired smile at the swarm of children surrounding him, rubbing the heads of the shorter ones as a reassuring gesture.

"LLLLLLLLL!"

He had just broken free of the crowd when he nearly fell to the ground as Mello quite literally threw himself on him.

"Welcome home, L."

Mello beamed up at him with his beautiful smile- the one that made the world slow down a bit to make it last a little longer. (L hadn't seen that smile in a long time.)

"Good to be back, Mello."

"Meeeelll, c'mon, I'm bored!"

L almost hadn't noticed Matt. He must have been tired- his brilliant red hair made him pretty hard to miss.

"Gimme a second, Matt," Mello pouted. He turned back to L, a mischievous sparkle in his eyes. "Did ya catch B, L? Didja catch 'im?"

L's smile fell.

"Yes…I caught him. He's being put on trial next week, charged with three counts of first degree murder."

"Hey, since they're trying him over in America, does that mean he could get the death penalty?" Matt asked offhandedly.

L nodded robotically, suddenly feeling very hollow.

"Yes…yes, he might."

_Not B...not him._

He wasn't sure how he would feel if Beyond were executed. A part of him ached at the thought of losing him in such a permanent way.

"_**He…he said my mother was a demon whore! He called me devil boy! Am I…**am **I a devil boy?"**_

"_**No. You could never be. You're special, Beyond. You could never be evil."**_

_I suppose…even **I **can't be right **all **the time. No matter what, everyone makes mistakes, and does things they can never take back. But we must keep moving forward. That is human nature. We all fall every once in awhile. We can't stay standing._

_Not all the time._


End file.
